Dating Advice For Women

This dating advice is specifically for women to help them be more successful in their dating and relationships.

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Signs He’s In Love With You

Home Dating Advice For Women

Signs He’s In Love With You

A common question women ask is, “What are the signs he’s in love with you?”

We all have our preconceived notions about what love is to us and how our partner shows they love us.Signs He's In Love With You

Some of us like to express our emotions while others – especially men – are the “strong and silent” type.

It could be that you know he’s in love with you if he says certain things.

Or he may show his love for you by your love language.

In an episode of Married At First Sight, for example, one husband had never said he loved his wife even after they decided on Decision Day to stay married. And yet she knew he loved her.

He obviously had fallen for her and was in love with her. He either secretly loved her, was scared of saying it for some reason, or he was hiding it and expressing it in ways other than saying it.

What’s more, particularly during the pandemic, some couples have not been able to see each other as often due to lockdown restrictions or quarantine restrictions. In fact, it has been recently reported that 15% of couples have either divorced or broken up because of the pandemic.

It’s been harder to show our love for someone when you can’t see them. You have to resort to texting, messaging, emails, Skype®, or other means to stay in touch when you can’t see each other in person.

In any case, it’s important that you know your guy is in love with you through various signs even if he doesn’t come out and say it in so many words.

None of us is perfect. Your man might not check all of the boxes when you’re looking for signs he’s in love with you.

But there are other specific…

Signs He’s In Love With You…Even If He Doesn’t Say It

1. He Treats You As His Priority

A man who loves you will put you before himself.

Men are wired to be protective and to provide for his partner and his children.

If your man is putting you (and your children, if you have any) before himself, then that’s a strong and powerful message that he’s in love with you.

2. He Tells You He Misses You

When you’re apart for some reason – whether it’s because he’s away on a business trip or you’re away visiting family or friends or you’re away on a work trip – and he feels lonely because you’re not with him, it indicates his love for you.

3. He “Gets” You

A man who loves you and is in love with you will understand you.

He’s attentive. He pays attention to the little details – the things you like and don’t like.

He understands your moods and your fears and your temperament. He’s considerate and he’s concerned about your well being and how your day was.

4. He’s A Giver, Not A Taker

In a similar way that he treats you as a priority, he also puts you first before himself. Perhaps he serves you dinner before he fills his plate. Perhaps he lets you shower before he does. Perhaps he gives you the best cut of a steak instead of having it for himself.

He puts you before himself and is selfless in many ways instead of selfish.

5. He’s Your Rock

A man who loves you is your rock. He’s the one person you can count on to turn to when things are rough and you need support and comforting. When you’re down he’s there to comfort you. When something goes wrong at work, he’s there to support you. When there’s a family issue or emergency or someone close to you dies, he’s there by your side comforting you. He takes your side and defends you.

6. He’s By Your Side No Matter What

He likes to be with you. He likes to spend time with you. He likes to do things with you. He likes to talk to you. He likes to be by your side. And he’s proud to be by your side.

7. He’s A Big Part Of – And Involved In – Your Life

He’s an integral part of your life. He knows your friends. He knows your family. He knows your background and your life history. He’s an extension of your life.

8. He Shows Signs He’s In Love With In Tangible Ways

The way he looks at you.

The compliments he makes about you.

The way he is proud of you and talks about you and your accomplishments.

The things he does for you that mean a lot to you.

These are all things that show he’s in love with you or he’s falling in love with you or that he loves you.

Now that you know signs he’s in love with you, you might want him to commit to a longer term relationship that leads to marriage.

Don’t Lose Him To Another Woman Now That You’ve Won His Heart

If you follow The Bachelor or The Bachelorette from season to season like many of us romantics at heart do, you’ll know that many couples on the show don’t end up together or married after the season ends. Eventually they call it quits and go there separate ways. Some find love with someone else. Others don’t.

When you find a guy who shows you he loves you, you don’t want to lose him, do you?

Look for signs he wants to commit but be aware of this:

You increase your chances of keeping him and having him treat you the way you want to be treated if you understand him.

Imagine this: He’s in love with you but another woman comes along, gets his attention, and lures him away from you.

The damage is usually done after a break up but there are ways to keep a man loyal and attracted to you – and only you – no matter what temptation is put in front of him.

If you want to keep your man and avoid losing him to another woman then discover the secrets of how to keep him.

(TD;LR) Signs He’s In Love With You

1. He Treats You As His Priority

2. He Tells You He Misses You

3. He “Gets” You

4. He’s A Giver, Not A Taker

5. He’s Your Rock

6. He’s By Your Side No Matter What

7. He’s A Big Part Of – And Involved In – Your Life

8. He Shows Signs He’s In Love With In Tangible Ways


How To Make Your Man Adore You

Signs He Loves You

Home Dating Advice For Women

Signs He Loves You 

Although a man might not say it – or might not say it very often – there are obvious signs he loves you, or at the very least is falling in love with you.

I covered signs he’s in love with you before but here are additional signs he loves you.Signs He Loves You

1. He Wants To Please You And Make You Happy

Men usually want to make their partner happy. Trouble is, they don’t always know how to do that.

Sometimes men will show their love and affection through their actions rather than through words.

If, for example, he doesn’t text you back then that’s okay. It doesn’t mean – and it’s not a sign – that he doesn’t love you or that he’s losing interest in you.

We all like to hear, “I love you,” but some men aren’t that way for whatever reason.

That doesn’t mean he’s a bad person or he doesn’t love you.

That’s just the way he is and he has other ways of showing his love for you.

Look for what he does for you – the actions that show he loves you.

2. He’s Perceptive About Your Feelings And Emotions

He sees you from a different perspective. It shows he cares. He knows when you’re down or depressed even when you say you’re fine. He knows your moods, your eccentricities.

3. He Respects Your Boundaries

If you have boundaries about relationships, beliefs, and sex, he respects them. He doesn’t force things onto you or make you feel bad about having boundaries.

4. He Shows His Love And Affection By The Way He Touches You

That long, deep kiss. On your lips. On your neck.

That small touch on your back.

The hand holding.

The hugs.

Those big, strong arms wrapped around you.

They’re all signs of his affection and love for you.

He also touches you mentally and emotionally. He does things that are sweet and touching,

They’re all signs of his love and affection for you.

5. He Doesn’t Care (Because He Accepts You The Way You Are)

It seems odd to think that if he doesn’t care it’s a sign he’s in love with you. But “he doesn’t care” has a special meaning here. It means he accepts you the way you are.

He doesn’t care that you’ve put on a little weight or that you “feel fat.”

He doesn’t care if you’re not in the mood for sex sometimes.

He accepts you no matter what.

6. He Knows Your Love Language

The 5 Love Languages® by Dr. Gary Chapman, Ph.D., are Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.

Each of us feels loved when our partner shows their love through a specific Love Language. Some of us need to hear, “I love you.” Some of us need our partner to show their love through things they do for us.

And some of us need to be touched.

We need to be kissed and caressed and made love to.

Your man knows your Love Language and uses it to show he’s in love with you and loves you.

7. He Knows Your Sex Language

Dr. Douglas Weiss, Ph.D., identifies 5 Sex Languages: Fun, Desire, Pleasure, Patience, Acceptance/Celebration.

If a man loves you, he won’t pressure you to have sex or to do things that you don’t want to do.

You’re tired after a long day at work and you don’t want to have sex or you’re not in the mood.

He wants to try anal play but you don’t want to experiment because you’re not that adventurous.

Many men use “blue balls” as an excuse to make their partner feel guilty about not having sex or as a way to demand sex when their partner isn’t in the mood, or they’re not getting enough sex, or they’re not satisfied with the sex.

But your man isn’t like that.

He likes to have fun when you’re having sex.

Or he expresses his desire for you and makes you feel appreciated and wanted.

Or he’s patient with you when you’re feeling sore or you don’t feel beautiful.

Some of us like to give pleasure during sex. It turns us on to know we’re pleasing our man and satisfying him.

You, for example, might like to give your man pleasure (see my treasury of naughty sex ideas in How To Drive Your Man Wild In Bed) and want to know more ways to spice things up in the bedroom.

Bonus Sign He Loves You

8. He Keeps His Word

He’s a man of his word. If he says he will do something, he does it. He doesn’t make excuses. He tries to pull out all of the stops to do what he promises he will do.

Of these signs he’s in love with you, how does your boyfriend, lover, or husband rate?

Hopefully you have a better understanding about the signs a man is in love with you.

He Loves You But Will You Be Able To Keep Him Or Will Another Woman Steal Him Away?

Just because he’s in love with you right now doesn’t mean you’ll remain together.

A relationship changes and evolves over time.

Your man, for example, might start pulling way or he might begin to have a wandering eye.

Now that you recognize the signs that he’s in love with you, you might want that to progress further to a proposal and engagement.

When a man starts talking about a future with you and includes you in his future, it’s a good sign – as long as he’s not just saying that to lead you on. And some men say that very early on in the infatuation stage of a relationship before you’ve both had a chance to get to know each other.

But, if you’re in an established and solid relationship and he talks about a future, then there’s a greater chance he’ll get down on bended knee when he thinks the time is right.

How To Keep Him

There is a way to improve your chances of being together as a couple (or as a married couple) and not suffering from a broken heart.

And that’s with knowing the secrets to keeping your man and not letting another woman steal him from you.

With these secrets by your side you improve your chances of having him see you in his life and wanting you as a life partner.


Of course, sex is usually an important part of a relationship. And the more satisfied your man is with his sex life, the happier he’ll be and the less likely he will be inclined to stray into the arms of another woman.

That’s why I created a treasury of “naughty girl” sex secrets to give your man MIND. BLOWING. SEX.

So be sure to discover the secrets to keeping your man and the treasury of “naughty girl” sex secrets for mind blowing sex (including sexy dirty talk and my exclusive Yes/No/Maybe Sex Checklist) now that you know the signs he’s in love with you.

(TD;LR) Signs He Loves You

1. He Wants To Please You And Make You Happy

2. He’s Perceptive About Your Feelings And Emotions

3. He Respects Your Boundaries

4. He Shows His Love And Affection By The Way He Touches You

5. He Doesn’t Care (Because He Accepts You The Way You Are)

6. He Knows Your Love Language

7. He Knows Your Sex Language

8. He Keeps His Word (BONUS sign he’s in love with you)


how to drive your man wild in bed and have hotter sex


Why Guys Don’t Text Back

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Why Guys Don’t Text Back

One of the most common questions women ask is, “Why don’t guys text back?Why Guys Don't Text Back

I know how frustrating this can be. After all, you put in the effort to send a text and then you don’t hear from him. You might even start getting in your own head and overthinking when there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation.

Does This Sound Familiar When You Text A Guy?

>> He rarely texts and when he does they are short or one-or-two word messages.
>> He texts when he wants to meet up or asks you on a date or when he cancels or when he wants to have sex.
>> He doesn’t text back after a date.
>> He doesn’t text back all day but you see he’s on social media or on an online dating site.
>> He doesn’t text good morning or good night anymore like he used to.
>> He only texts when he feels like it, which isn’t very often.
>> He likes to sext or the texts turn to talk about sex.
>> You get into a routine of saying good morning and good night to each other and then one day he disappears. It makes you wonder whether he’s with someone else OR he’s not who he says he is.
>> You become obsessed and text him way too much – especially if he doesn’t respond to your text messages.
>> You text to keep in touch but he doesn’t initiate texts and takes his time responding, if he responds at all.

As you can see, there are so many situations where a guy doesn’t respond to your text.

And you want to know why he doesn’t text you back or why he doesn’t text back often or often enough or soon enough.

You want to know what’s a valid reason for him not texting back, especially if you went on a date with him and you both had a good date or a good first date and hit it off.

Questions That Might Run Through Your Mind When You Text A Guy And He Doesn’t Respond Immediately:

>> What does it mean when a guy doesn’t text you back for hours or days?

>> Why don’t guys text back right away?

>> How long should you wait if a guy doesn’t text back?

>> What should you do when he doesn’t text back for days?

Where Are You In The Relationship?

Before we look at reasons why or what it means, here are some things to consider:

1. Are you in an established relationship or is it a casual friendship (with perhaps sex thrown in)?

2. Are you in a new relationship where you’re still getting to know each other?

3. Are you trying to develop a relationship or get to know a guy you’ve just met?

4. Are you in a situation where you’ve NEVER met this guy in real life? In other words, you’ve only “met” online – on Tinder or another online dating site?

5. Are you in a long distance “relationship” but have never met, but only talked on the phone or Skyped or only met once or twice but live apart and rarely see each other?

Chances are you’re asking why he doesn’t text back because you like him and you want to get to know him to see if he’s boyfriend material.

What does it mean when a guy doesn’t text you back or doesn’t text you for a week?

There’s no easy answer to why a guy doesn’t text back but there can be reasons why he doesn’t return your messages.

1. He’s genuinely busy

> He’s got work to do or he’s in a meeting
> He travels a lot and is busy with work and has limited time
> He’s playing sports or doing his favorite hobby
> He’s got other commitments with his buddies and is socializing
> He’s studying for exams

You’re not a priority to him. When you text bomb him, it makes it look like you’re checking up on him and guys hate that and start feeling smothered.

2. He’s just not that into you

In other words, you’re not important to him and he has no intention of being in a relationship with you.

The more important you are to him, the more he will respond and the faster he will usually respond, at least in the initial stages of a relationship when he’s getting to know you, if he’s interested in dating you.

3. He has nothing to say

Sometimes, he just has nothing to say. And getting your “hey” in a message isn’t an incentive for him to respond.

4. He’s gotten used to you.

The relationship “honeymoon” is over and he doesn’t have to impress you with his attentiveness.

5. He doesn’t feel like “chatting” right now.

6. He has more important things to do than text.

7. He’s playing with you/manipulating you/toying or playing with your emotions.

Stay strong. There are plenty of guys out there who would love to have you as a girlfriend. You just have to find the guy who is right for you.

8. He’s found someone else, is already involved with someone else, or he’s gotten back with his ex.

9. He’s a jerk and he’s not worth your time. Move on.

10. He’s a SCAMMER.

You could be setting yourself up to have your phone hacked or, at the very least, your heart broken. Block him!

What To Do When A Guy Doesn’t Text You Back

1. Establish your boundaries.

If the type of behavior where he doesn’t text back within a reasonable time is unacceptable to you, either tell him or move on.

2. It’s okay to initiate but if it’s not reciprocated, move on.

If you’re hoping something will happen and he’ll wake up and confess his love for you, it’s not going to happen.

3. Be careful not to pursue.

Let him “earn” your affection. Don’t get me wrong here. Most guys love the attention. They like a woman who knows her mind, who goes after what she wants, who has confidence, and who has skills that prove she’s a gift to the man she loves.

But, in general, don’t chase him. If he’s not responding, he’s not interested and he’s not boyfriend material.

4. Don’t overthink things and fuel your insecurities.

When you overthink and fuel your insecurities you do things you wouldn’t normally do, like texting him too much. When you do that, you come across as “needy” or “clingy” and those qualities are a turn-off for a guy.

(TD;LR): Top 4 Reasons Why Guys Don’t Text Back

1. He’s just not that into you.

2. He’s genuinely busy.

3. He’s a scammer and he’s preying upon your emotions.

4. He’s a jerk and he’s not worth your time.

As you can see, there are many reasons why guys don’t text back but this should give you some idea on how to react and respond when you don’t hear from a guy.

Guy Doesn’t Text Back

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Guy Doesn’t Text Back

A common complaint many women have when dating or when being in a relationship is that the guy doesn’t text back.Guy Doesn't Text Back

In the first part of why guys don’t text back, I gave you 10 reasons why guys go silent as well as what to do if that happens to you.

But there’s more…

If you’re not in a relationship but there’s someone you’re interested in, the scenario might go like this…

You meet a guy online. Maybe it’s on POF, or, or Tinder, or another online dating site.

Or you meet him in person at an event or a concert or a party or while you’re standing in line to buy a coffee.

You exchange phone numbers.

You start texting back and forth.

You make plans to meet.

The first date is fun and you enjoyed being with him.

You think this might be the start of something great and you think there might be a relationship that has potential.

You make plans and you see each other again, only this time you spend overnight with him.

When you leave, he tells you he will definitely see you again soon.

And then you don’t hear from him.

No texts. No calls. No messages.

Before the overnight stay, he was constantly texting you and you were texting him.

Now it’s radio silence.

And it leaves you wondering whether this was simply a hookup and you were played so he could have sex with you.

Now you wonder whether you should text him or let it go and chalk it up to experience.

Of course, there are…

Other Scenarios Where A Guy Doesn’t Text Back:

Texting is quick and simple. It’s perfect for those of us who want to keep in touch without spending a lot of time on the phone. In fact, some women complain that their guy texts too much instead of calling on the phone.

There are different situations you might find yourself in when it comes to texting a guy:

>> Initially there’s a flurry of texts and then they taper off and he goes silent. And then he resurfaces, sometimes days or weeks or months later.
>> He starts texting you less, promises to do better after you speak to him about it, but never changes his ways.
>> You have a “texting relationship” and he wants to continue to text but you never meet.
>> You want to know how to get him to respond to you when you don’t hear from him.
>> You know he reads your messages but he doesn’t or won’t reply.
>> You like him or really love him but he doesn’t text you back and you’re confused, hurt, and afraid the relationship is changing or deteriorating.
>> He starts messaging you out of the blue after you haven’t heard from him for days, weeks, or even months.
>> You’re in a relationship and you want to connect or bond with him and you do that through text messages.
>> You’re afraid he’s losing interest in you and you don’t know what to do.
>> He texts you back after a few hours or the next day or even days later.
>> You don’t know him very well but you’re trying to get to know him to see if he’s boyfriend material.
>> The texting pattern changes and you feel hurt and anxious even though you try not to let it bother you and you know you should give him his space.

Reasons Why A Guy Never Texts Back (Even After A First Or Second Date)

1. He’s lazy.

He’s the type of guy who hardly makes any effort to contact you or communicate with you. He’s okay with you contacting him but it’s not usually reciprocated.

This is the guy who isn’t a good prospect as a boyfriend because if he doesn’t make an effort responding to your messages he won’t make the effort to get to know you.

2. He doesn’t care.

He could be selfish or narcissistic. Either way, it’s all about him, not about you and he wants you to do the work contacting him, not the other way around.

3. He turns his phone off during the day.

Some guys just don’t want the distraction of messages and calls during the day. So they turn off their phone until they’re ready to respond.

4. He’s keeping you as a “spare” and pursuing other women.

He’s keeping his options open especially after a date or after having sex with you by texting you occasionally, but for the most part he’s tied up with other women. That means you’re on the back burner, his “other option” if something doesn’t work with someone else, and he’s definitely not good boyfriend material.

5. He doesn’t want anything serious so he doesn’t want to encourage your attention or affections.

He may have even told you that he doesn’t want anything serious. But he still wants to see you and have fun (and sex) with you.

Chances are this won’t go anywhere and will end up hurting you if you continue to pursue him and find he doesn’t respond to your advances.

6. He had sex with you and is no longer interested because his curiosity is satisfied.

It happens. There’s a flurry of texting. There’s lots of sexual references in messages. But once you’ve slept with him there’s nothing else for him to pursue and he disappears. The point is, all he wanted was sex, not a relationship.

7. He’s got other distractions in his life and isn’t interested in dating you or having a relationship with you.

Some guys just don’t have it together. Or they have so many distractions and other obligations that they don’t want to be involved with someone.

8. He doesn’t have time for texting or for a relationship.

Some guys really are busy and have too much going on in their life to be involved with someone.

9. He’s leading you on.

During a date he talks about how he likes you and wants to get to know you.

He talks about having a future with you. He even paints a picture of what it will be like together.

And you fall under his spell of what the future looks like with him.

But the truth is, you don’t know each other very well and you don’t know if he’s The One.

You’re romanticizing the relationship (or what might turn into a relationship) instead of being realistic and recognizing that it’s too early to know how things will turn out. Instead, let things progress and mature to see if there really is a future with this guy.

10. He’s pulling away.

This is normal for guys who are confused and not sure what they want. In other words, they take a step back. This is the type of guy who takes time to “come around” so all might not be lost. But it’s tricky to know if he’s pulling away or just not interested.

What To Do When A Guy Doesn’t Text You Back

1. Carry on with your own life.

Your life doesn’t revolve around a guy.

And it doesn’t revolve around whether or not he texts you or whether he’s slow in texting you.

Go out with your friends or get involved in your hobbies and passions and don’t dwell on a guy who doesn’t text you back.

2. Increase your self-confidence.

Don’t act needy or clingy, because those are two traits that turn men off.

Get to know the guy in real life instead of through texting.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to get a text from a guy you’re interested in.

Just don’t obsess over it. And don’t look for hidden meanings if he’s slow in returning your text or he doesn’t text back at all.

3. Stay true to yourself.

If he’s not doing what he promised he would do, make a decision and, if need be, move on.

If he doesn’t treat you the way you want him to treat you, if he doesn’t apologize for his behavior, if he continues to do something that you don’t like, block his number and move on.

4. Look for a guy who is “into” you.

There’s lots of guys out there. And at least one is perfect for you. Spend time looking for the guy who is perfect for you and will give you the attention you want rather than chasing or fretting over a guy who doesn’t respond to you.

(TD;LR), Top 5 Reasons Why Guys Don’t Text Back

1. He’s lazy and wants to be chased.

2. He doesn’t want anything serious.

3. He’s keeping his options open but is busy with other women.

4. He’s leading you on.

5. He’s no longer interested *after* having sex with you.

Now you have an idea why guys don’t text back and what to do about it so that you can find the guy who is your perfect match.

How To Tell If A Guy Likes Me Quiz

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How To Tell If A Guy Likes Me Quiz

You’ve met a guy and you’re attracted to him. But you don’t know if the feelings are reciprocated. So you are asking yourself, “Does he like me?”

This “How To Tell If A Guy Likes Me Quiz” is different – you’ll know if he likes you back almost immediately instead of waiting for an answer or having an answer emailed to you. Plus, it’s comprehensive – it tells you what things to consider and what to be on the lookout for.

In Obvious Signs A Guy Secretly Likes You I showed you 27 signs he likes you.How To Tell If A Guy Likes Me Quiz

Here are the questions to ask yourself to determine whether a guy you like is interested in you – whether it’s at school, work, class, or someone you’ve just met.

1. Is he in an existing relationship or does he have a girlfriend?

If he’s in an existing relationship or he has a girlfriend then he may like you but he may not be interested in having a relationship with you.

It depends on how solid his existing relationship is.

If it’s rocky and you foresee a breakup is going to happen, then he may be showing interest because he’s no longer interested in his current girlfriend.

Beware, though, as I explained in my other article about whether he likes you, you may become the “rebound” in which case if you were to get into a relationship with him, it might be short lived.

Also, feelings and emotions run high after a break up.

Sometimes couples get back together again.

Other times, they’re happy to no longer be dating.

And still other times you could be accused of mate poaching and “stealing” someone’s boyfriend.

2. Has he asked you for your phone number?

If he has asked you for his phone number then he’s showing interest in you. If he hasn’t asked you for your phone number then he’s either not interested or he’s shy and afraid of being rejected.

If that’s the case, you may have to take the initiative and give him your number and suggest he call you.

3. How often does he call you if he has your phone number?

The more often he contacts you the more apparent it will be that he’s into you. Does he call you or text you? Some people don’t like to talk in person because they don’t know what to say. But they’re good at texting and it’s quicker for them.

4. Does he initiate phone or text messages or do you initiate them?

If he initiates the calls or messages then it’s a strong indicator that he likes you and wants to get to know you better. If you have to initiate calls or text messages then he’s either lazy, shy, or not interested.

5. How quickly does he return your text messages or voicemails?

A guy who is interested in you is going to show that interest in his actions. And one way to do so is to be attentive and get back to you as soon as he can.

Of course, he may be tied up in a meeting or in class or he’s unable to get back to you right away. But if he’s taking more than a day to get back to you, chances are he’s either too busy, not interested, or something has prevented him from getting back to you. Generally, though, it’s pretty simple to send a quick text message.

6. Has he initiated conversations with you?

Has he walked up to you and started a conversation or do you have to start the conversation?

It’s a strong indication of his interest in you if he initiates conversations. But if he engages with you when you start the conversation that’s a good sign as well. Keep in mind, some guys are shy and they won’t initiate a conversation. As well, some guys are tongue-tied, especially if they think you’re hot, and don’t want to look stupid.

7. What do you talk about with him when you’re talking to him?

Do you talk about your hobbies, passions, interests? Do you talk about your families? Do you talk about work or school?

The more you talk about things that are of interest to you – and to him – the more likely he will be interested in you.

Be on the lookout for comments he makes about past girlfriends, past relationships, or whether he’s looking for a girlfriend or a relationship.

If you’re bold, go ahead and ask him about his past relationships and try and discover what went wrong – it could be something that’s a red flag and tells you that he’s not boyfriend material. For example, he might have cheated in a past relationship or he might have gotten his ex girlfriend pregnant.

There are also other questions you can talk about on a date.

8. Has he asked you for (nude) selfies or do you send him selfies?

If a guy asks you for selfies (of you in your lingerie or nude) then he’s interested in having sex with you. Chances are he’s not interested in having a relationship with you.

It’s normal for a guy to be sexually interested in you if there’s attraction and chemistry.

But there’s an appropriate time to ask for nude photos or phots of you wearing your undies. That time is when you’re in a relationship and even then you should be cautious doing so.

9. Has he ever complimented you on your hair, makeup, or what you’re wearing?

If he tells his friends you’re “cute” or you’re “hot” then there’s a good chance he’s attracted to you.

If he says, “Hello, beautiful” or “You look gorgeous in that dress” then he’s definitely interested in you and likes you.

10. Does he try and make you laugh?

One of the quickest ways to someone’s heart is to feel good around someone else.

If he makes jokes or tries to make you laugh then he’s interested in you.

11. Does he tease you or does he flirt with you?

Strangely enough, some guys show their interest in a woman by teasing her.

Obviously, it depends on the type of teasing but if he’s playfully teasing you and you react to his teasing by flirting then chances are he likes you. If he flirts back at you then obviously he likes you back.

12. Has he said or done something that indicated he’s interested in you or not interested in you?

Does he go out of his way to help you or interact with you? Or does he avoid you?

13. Does he confide in you?

Does he confide in you about someone he likes? Or someone he’d like to date?

If so, you might be in the “friend zone” and not seen as relationship or girlfriend material.

14. Has he kissed you or hugged you or held your hand?

These are obvious indications he likes you and is interested in you.

15. Does he follow you on Instagram or Facebook?

If he does, does he comment on or like your posts or photos? Those are indications of interest in you.

16. What would happen if you got together with him for Netflix and chill?

Would you cuddle? Would you kiss? If he likes you back, would you have sex with him? Those actions will tell you how much he likes you.

How To Become A Skilled Lover To The Guy Who Likes You

If he likes you and is interested in you, there’s a good chance that you’ll start dating.

If that happens and you become boyfriend and girlfriend, chances are you’ll want to have sex.

For most couples, having sex is a normal part of a relationship and is a bonding experience.

Whether you’re inexperienced or you want to develop your sexual “moves” even more, How To Drive Your Man Wild In Bed can help you take your lovemaking skills to a higher level.

You’ll discover sex moves like….

>> 2 spellbinding ways to quickly give your man an erotic charge and ignite his sexual hunger for you. These centuries-old seduction tricks are guaranteed to reduce even strong, manly, macho men to putty in your hands. (Pages 53 and 66.)

>> 22 shameless sex questions to ask him to find out what his deepest, darkest sex secrets are and what REALLY turns him on. It will feel like you’re reading his mind and you’ll find out how naughty he really is. (Page 7.)

>> 16 flirty and suggestive text messages that excite his imagination and get him in the mood before he arrives at your doorstep. (Page 9.)

>> 9 hot, romantic, and erotic sex scenes. Push the boundaries and put his imagination into overdrive. It’s a powerful way to excite him and heighten the anticipation of things to come. (Starts on page 38.)

>> Does he make a fuss about putting on mood-destroying condoms and put you at risk for pregnancy or disease? Two easy ways to shut down his complaints and still keep him happy. Plus, condom size chart and online sources for private and confidential ordering. (Pages 64 and 346.)

>> Ramp things up in the bedroom: 8 hot, sexy, “oh-that-feels-so-good” places to touch him to get him closer to the edge. (Starts on page 203.)

If giving your man amazing sexual pleasure is important in your relationship, then click the following link for How To Drive Your Man Wild In Bed.

Obvious Signs A Guy Secretly Likes You

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Dating Advice For Women – Signs A Guy (Secretly) Likes You

Sometimes you’re not sure the guy who you think is cute and who you’re interested in actually likes you. In that case, you start looking for obvious or tell-tale signs he likes you or he’s into you.

It quickly becomes the key question on your mind when you’re interested in a guy – especially if you want to have a relationship with him.

Your mind goes into “relationship mode” where you analyze and interpret everything that revolves around him or involves him. You think back on conversations, gestures, text messages, phone calls, emails, Instagram or Facebook postings and likes, or other signals that show he could be interested in you.

He smiles at you – you interpret that to mean he likes you.

He talks to you – you interpret that to mean he’s interested in you.

He looks at you across the room – you interpret that to mean he wants to get to know you better or is harboring feelings for you.

This is the usual dating “ritual” where two people are attracted to each other but they’re shy or hesitant to make their feelings known because they’re afraid they’ll be rebuffed or rejected if the feelings aren’t reciprocated.

In fact, these signs could be more than just being interested in a guy. They could be signs you’re falling in love with him – even if you don’t know him very well and haven’t yet dated to any great extent (or at all).

Tell-Tale Signs A Guy Is Interested In You

Here are signs he’s interested in you even though he doesn’t come out and tell you…

1) He smiles at you a lot
2) He stares at you…and quickly looks away when you “catch” him staring
3) He tries to impress you
4) He always seems to be hanging out where you are
5) He flirts with you
6) He laughs and jokes with you
7) He gets jealous when you flirt with other guys
8) He asks your friends about you
9) He follows you around without trying to be obvious
10) He asks for your cell number
11) He wants you to add him as your friend on Facebook
12) He shows off to get you to notice him
13) He sneaks glances at you and turns away quickly when you look at him
14) He hangs out with your friends and makes a point of ignoring you
15) He “accidentally” bumps into you
16) His friends tease him when you’re around (because they know he likes you)
17) He makes up reasons to be near you
18) He compliments your new hairstyle or new outfit
19) He teases you in a playful manner to make you smile or notice him
20) He gets to know your BFF so he can be around you
21) He tries to make you laugh


Other Signs A Guy Likes You

There are also other signs a guy might be interested in you that are more obvious, even though he hasn’t come out and said he’s interested in you or that he wants to date you:

22) He spends time with you and introduces you to his friends (and even his family). (You have to be careful you’re not friend-zoned and he treats you as a “buddy” rather than as a romantic interest.)

23) He’s not seeing anyone else and he’s not in a relationship. (This is a good indication that he might be interested in a relationship especially if you show interest and there’s mutual attraction.)

24) He sends you text messages (if he’s asked for your cell number and you’ve given it to him).

25) He sends texts a lot and usually every day.

26) He responds to your text messages quickly.

27) He “ignores” you or acts as though he’s not interested when you’re around him. (This is counter-intuitive but it has the psychological effect of making you want him and desire him even more, if you’re attracted to him.)

These are all signs if you’re asking yourself, “How do I know a guy likes me?” or “How do I know a guy likes me back?” even if he’s quiet or shy.

Of course, it can also depend on your age. If you and the guy you’re interested in are young(er) you’ll have to rely on the signs more because it’s usually difficult to talk about feelings to each other. If you’re both older, then there’s more likelihood that you’ll be more open and upfront about your feelings for each other.

Keep in mind, though, that these are simply signs a guy is interested in you. Until he comes out and tells you or he asks you out on dates, you really won’t know for certain. He might, for example, be an outgoing guy who is friendly to everyone and who has no specific interest in you. That would be obvious if he is dating other women or if he has a girlfriend.

Beware, also, that he might be showing interest in you because he’s just broken up with his girlfriend, in which case you could become his “rebound” girlfriend where the relationship doesn’t last. In fact, it may be seen that you’re mate poaching and stealing him from his girlfriend or you were the cause of their breakup.

It shouldn’t always be signs that you look for. You can also play an active role in getting his attention and getting to know him to see if he’s boyfriend material. You do that with flirting techniques.

How To Become An Exciting And Talented Lover To The Guy Who Likes You

If he likes you and you start dating him and get into a relationship, chances are you’ll have sex at some point. For most couples, that’s a normal transition in a relationship as you get to know each other.

If you’re inexperienced at sex or you want to develop your sexual skills even further then How To Drive Your Man Wild In Bed can help you.

You’ll discover sex moves like….

>> 2 shocking pleasure zones that give him sheet-grabbing pleasure. (Warning: He’s embarrassed to tell you about them because they immediately put him under your feminine spell.) (Pages 110 and 273.)

>> HOTTER FOREPLAY. Thrill every nook and cranny of his body with these 9 “bad girl moves” that make good girls blush. (Page 347.)

>> Looking for complex, complicated, hard-to-master Kama Sutra sex positions with fancy names? Phffffft! Forget about them. There’s no need to twist yourself into a pretzel or pretend you’re a wishbone to experience peak pleasure. Instead, discover 12 of the hottest and most intensely satisfying sex positions that give maximum exhilaration without having to strain muscles or hurt your back. PLUS, 2 “acrobatic” ones reserved for sexually adventurous couples only. (Starts on page 150.)

>> Turn up the raw, sexual heat in the bedroom. 4 top rated Fun Pleasure Playthings for couples. Buy them and try them for bigger, better, badder thrills. (Page 60.)

>> 5 wickedly-wild “sex play” techniques that cause him to totally surrender to your playful seductiveness. You sexy, naughty girl, you! (Starts on page 202.)

>> The Ultimate Pleasure Enhancer reserved exclusively for the adventurous man. Shock him. Delight him. WOW him. Take him to explosive heights with this erotic “mouth and finger” move. (See page 66.)

>> And much, much more to excite and thrill your man including Sexy Dirty Talk for the bedroom and sexting, my exclusive Yes/No/Maybe Sex Checklist, with more than 80 sizzling hot, sexy, and tastefully taboo sex topics, and my MEGA brain download of Relationship Tips and Advice to capture your man’s heart and elevate your lovemaking to new heights.

If giving your man greater sexual pleasure is important to you, then click the following link for How To Drive Your Man Wild In Bed.

What To Talk About On A Date With A Guy

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What To Talk About On A Date With A Guy If You’re On A First Date Or Dating A New Guy

Does your mind ever go blank and you don’t know what to talk about on a date with a guy when you’re with him? You’re not alone.

It seems strange that your mind goes blank, especially if he’s hot and you’re attracted to him.What to talk on a date with a guy

But sometimes it’s that attraction to a guy that causes your mind to go blank because you’re feeling the butterflies and the heat of sexual chemistry.

It’s important to know what to talk about on a date and what questions to ask and what information to give out so you can get to know each other better.

After all, this guy could be “The One” or your date could lead to a long term relationship and even getting married.

If you “meet” a guy online there are specific questions you should ask him before agreeing to meet or go on a date.

But if you meet someone in person or you’ve been going back and forth online and he asks you out, then you need to be prepared with questions to ask and things to talk about so the date goes smoothly and you get asked out on a second (or more) date.

It’s even more important to have some idea about what you want to talk to a guy about and what questions to ask if he’s shy or introverted.

Topics And Questions: What To Ask And Talk About On A First Date With A Guy

Here is a sample of the questions to ask, which are included in the Girl Gets Great Guy System, and what to talk about on a first date with a guy. They should give you a quick “snapshot” of who he is and what he’s all about:

1. What do you do for FUN and in your free/spare time? (Hobbies, passions, and interests)

2. Have you ever been here before? (Presumably he’s taking you somewhere on your date.)

3. Where’s your favorite place to go to for a vacation?

4. How do you celebrate major holidays like Easter, Thanksgiving, and Christmas?

5. Where have you traveled to?

6. What do you do for work?

7. Is your ex still in the picture? On good terms? Do you have much or any contact?

8. What would you do if you lost your job?

9. Any children? How old? What do they do (school/college, married, working, living with ex, on their own)? Where do they live?

10. Do you drink, do drugs (except prescription), gamble, smoke?

11. Have you ever been arrested or been in jail?

12. Tell me about your family. Brothers? Sisters? Parents? Are your parents still together? Who are you closest to?

13. What are some things you can’t live without? (Some people can’t live without their coffee, their family, their friends. The answer will tell you what’s most important to him and will also reveal his passions, interests, quirks, and habits.)

14. Are you close to your family and/or children?

15. How would you describe your childhood/fondest memory of your childhood? Happy? Turbulent? Loving?

16. Which parent are you closest to: your mother or your father or neither?

17. What’s the worst (craziest, funniest, silliest, stupidest) thing you did as a child/or you’ve done in life?

These days, a lot of people “meet” or “hookup” through online dating.

Online dating is where you will determine whether there is anything there to meet in person and whether you want to continue seeing and dating this man.

Usually it will come down to whether you have a good first date or a bad first date. With a good date things are easy and the conversation flows well.

With a bad date things are awkward, or off-putting, or answers to questions are evasive, or there are too many sexual innuendos or references to sex.

Relationship Topics To Talk About On A Date With A Guy 

These are typical questions you could be asked by a man when you meet in person. You might have already covered them when chatting with him. But they may be asked again so be prepared with an answer that doesn’t turn him off!

Some of the questions give you a sense of his availability and to see whether he’s your “type.” It’s not about being too picky, it’s about being smart and not wasting your time.

These are the type of questions that get the conversation going and continuing on a date.

1. What do you like about being in a relationship? (Cuddling, kissing, hugging, etc.)
2. Tell me about your luck with dating.
3. Are you dating right now? Do you go on a lot of dates? (Could be a “red flag” if he does a LOT of online dating and isn’t looking for anything serious. Instead, he’s looking for sex.)
4. What are you looking for in a relationship?
5. What type of women do you date? What type of woman do you normally go for? What do you look for or like in a woman?
6. How long have you been single?
7. When was your last relationship?
8. What happened in your last relationship?
9. Did you break up with her or did she break up with you or dump you?
10. What’s the longest relationship you’ve been in? (His answer could indicate whether he’s “just looking” or is serious about being in a relationship.)
11. What would be a perfect relationship to you? (His answer could reveal surprising things that indicate you and he are on the same page or that you’re incompatible because what he wants from a relationship may be entirely different from what you want.)

Should You Talk About Sex On A First Date With A Guy?

If you want a guy to perk up and start talking, just ask him questions about sex.

Trouble is, it’s too soon to ask about sex if you’re on a first date.

You may have been asked sexual questions if you’ve been texting back and forth with him, but the reality is, you don’t know this guy yet.

You don’t know if he’s a good guy or someone who is just looking for sex while you’re looking for a solid, long term relationship.

It’s your choice, of course. But you want to get to know the guy first before you dive into sex, because there are specific questions about sex that you need answers to before going to bed with him.

Girl Gets Great Guy System

Why You Talk With A Guy About These Things On A Date And Ask These Types Of Questions

Just because you and the guy you’re chatting with are looking for the same thing from a relationship doesn’t mean you’re compatible.

There are several areas you want to explore to see if you’re compatible with him. Some of these areas overlap but they will give you an idea of how compatible you are.

Here’s a quick overview of these compatibility areas:

1. Lifestyle

You want to know that you both have a similar lifestyle. One of you might be on the go all the time with traveling and business. The other might have a more laid back and calmer lifestyle.

2. Emotional Maturity

Emotional maturity includes how he views a relationship and you. Is he faithful and believes in a monogamous relationship? Is he romantic and loving? Is he empathetic and shows emotion or sentiment on occasion?

Emotional maturity also includes whether he is mature or whether he has anger issues or is immature in the way he approaches life.

4. Interests and Hobbies

It’s nice to have similar interests so that you can do things together.

And it’s also nice to have your own interests that bring you joy and satisfaction.

You don’t want to be together all the time otherwise you’re going to feel smothered.

5. Religious Beliefs and Customs

Religious beliefs and customs can be stumbling blocks in compatibility if you and the guy you’re interested in are from different religious faiths.

If you are from different religious faiths there has to be agreement about what faith to observe (and raise children under if that applies to your situation).

And you have to know that your family and his family are also in agreement, otherwise it will cause friction in the relationship.

6. Financial Situation

Does he take care of his finances? Or does he have unpaid bills and borrows from friends or ask you for money?

Ideally you want someone who is successful in his job or career, has some money put away for a rainy day, and doesn’t spend so lavishly that he’s heavily in debt.

7. Social Life and Social Graces

How does he interact with others? Is he friendly to people? Does he treat others politely?

If you’re a social butterfly who likes partying a lot and he’s more comfortable staying at home reading or watching movies or playing online games then there could be a mismatch in compatibility.

8. Support

Does he support you emotionally, stand up for you, and have your back?

Does he make you feel safe or do you feel alone and on your own even when you’re together?

9. Morals and Values

Do his morals and values align with yours?

Or does he like to take “shortcuts” and cheat people out of things or do things that are shady or even illegal?

All of these areas are important to consider to see if you’re compatible with a guy.

Ultimately, when you’re primed with questions about what to talk to a guy about on a first date or you’re dating someone new, you’re finding out whether you’re compatible with each other, have interests that align, and whether he will treat you well.

Top 7 Reasons Why Men Suddenly Vanish Or Disappear

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“Why men vanish or disappear is one of the most frequently asked questions from women. Men disappear or vanish for a number of reasons and you have no control over that. Sometimes it’s a good thing that a man disappears – it saves a woman from heartbreak and investing time and effort into trying to create a relationship with an unavailable man.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coachwhite-roses

You can still remember that last date you had with him.

It was so much fun.

He was handsome.

He was gallant.

He was funny.

He complimented you and told you how sexy and crazy smart you were.

You flirted with him and teased him.

You held his hand as you walked along the beach as the sun was setting.

At the end of the date he told you how much fun he’d had.

And then he leaned in and kissed you passionately.

And as he held you after the kiss he whispered that he’d call you.

You’re on cloud nine.

Romance is in the air.

You think he’s The One.

You think about him all the time.

And then you wait for his call.

One day goes by.

Two days go by.

Three days go by.

And then you get that sinking feeling in your stomach.

And deep down you know he won’t call.

And then you start wondering what went wrong.

It was a perfect date.

You were both into each other.

You connected with him like no other.

You were both happy, laughing, and having fun.

You were enjoying each other’s company.

At least it seemed that way on the date.

Truth is something probably didn’t click for him.

It might have been something you did.

It might have been something you said that turned him off.

Maybe he didn’t like the way you kissed.

Or it might be all about him.

We’ve all been there. We’ve all had those great dates that seemed like there was something there only to find out that the other person wasn’t interested or wasn’t “feeling it.”

If you consistently can’t get past date one or two or three with men then there’s a good chance that either you’re picking the wrong men (in which case you’re probably not asking the right questions to “vet” them before you meet them) or you’re doing or saying something wrong that turns them off.

Top 7 Reasons Why Men Suddenly Vanish Or Disappear

You’ll never know why he disappeared. Some of these reasons might seem frivolous or lame. But to a man, they’re very real. And the outcome is the same: He disappears.

Here are 7 possible reasons why he disappeared:

1. He’s A Commitment-Phobe

Some guys are terrified of commitment. To them, commitment means being tied down and not being able to do the things they enjoy.

And if he’s a “player” there is no way he’ll look for anything long term.

Commitment-phobes don’t want to get involved in a relationship. And if things seem like they could get serious then they’re out of there before they get into a relationship.

2. He’s Not Available

He might be dating a number of women.

Or he might already be in a relationship.

Worse still he might be married and you’re the affair he’s having on the side.

Or he just might not be emotionally available.

He might have just separated or gotten divorced and needs time to heal before jumping back into a relationship.

He might be getting over anger. He might be getting over being hurt.

In this case you become the “rebound” girl. He’ll look to you for support, sympathy, and sex. And once he’s healed, he’ll most likely look for someone else.

Or he might still be in love with his ex. If he is still in love with his ex, instead of accepting who you are and your unique qualities, he’ll make comparisons to see how you measure up.

If he’s a widower he might still be grieving. He’s jumped back into dating because he’s looking to fill the void left after his wife passed away. In which case, he’s not really ready to date or be in a committed relationship.

He needs time to heal from his grief before he can start fresh. And that can take a year or more before he’s ready to start a new relationship.

Whichever is the case, be thankful you didn’t hear from him before things got really serious and he broke your heart.

3. He’s Not Into You

He doesn’t feel the chemistry.

He doesn’t find you attractive.

And he might have been telling you that you’re sexy and attractive so he doesn’t hurt your feelings.

In any event, he’s too polite to tell you that he doesn’t feel anything and doesn’t want to see you again.

4. He’s Looking For A Playmate

Some guys are players and they’re looking for sex.

They want a woman who is “easy” and wants to have sex without any strings attached.

He doesn’t want to take the time to get to know you or to spend time romancing you. All he wants is to have sex with you and move on.

Fortunately, you’re not that kind of girl. And had you succumbed to his charming ways and slept with him you would have regretted it.

5. You Weren’t Fun

He didn’t like your personality. He found you boring. And he’s looking for someone who is fun and who excites his imagination.

Perhaps you asked boring questions. Don’t make it a job interview or an interview for a husband. Keep things light.

Or perhaps your answers to his questions were boring. If that’s the case you might need to brush up on your flirting techniques.

If he found you boring then you weren’t compatible with each other from the beginning. And meeting him in person confirmed that.

6. You Weren’t Feminine Enough For Him

Some guys like a girly girl – a woman who dresses sexy.

If you came straight from work, you might be wearing your work clothes instead of something more feminine.

Many men want to see your feminine side. And some women – especially if they’re successful and independent – don’t know how to tone down their masculine side so that they come across as an attractive woman.

In fact, some women are so independent that they take care of things themselves and don’t give the man a chance to lead. And that’s a relationship killer.

7. You Show Your Anger And Hurt From A Previous Relationship

It takes time to get over the hurt and heart break of a previous relationship or a divorce. And if you jump into dating too soon your emotions are likely to spill over or rear their ugly head on a date.

You haven’t gone through a dating detox to rid yourself of the emotions that are still fresh on your mind.

In fact, you’re probably not ready for dating – and it’s too early to date – if that’s the case.

If your date asks you what happened in your previous relationship or why you got divorced, you might be tempted to talk about your horrible ex and how he cheated on you or left you in financial hell.

Or you might be tempted to badmouth him for leaving you and your kids when they’re so young and vulnerable.

Your bitterness, anger, and hurt are fine to dump on a close, understanding friend.

But to a potential partner? To someone who’s looking for someone who is ready for a relationship your bitterness, anger, and hurt could be enough to scare them away.

The point is, you don’t have to go into detail. You simply say you grew apart or keep it vague and use the term “irreconcilable differences.”

How To Protect Your Heart From Disappointment

No matter how good the dates were, realize that you’re not in a relationship after one or two dates.

You’re not in a relationship if you’ve been chatting and texting for weeks or months and you think you “know” him.

You’re not in a relationship if you’ve never met him in person.

You’re not in a relationship if you sleep with him – it doesn’t bond him closer to you by having sex with you.

You’re not in a relationship until you meet him and spend time together over several months.

You’re not in a relationship until you’re both exclusive – in other words, both of you are no longer dating anyone else.

Until you are in an exclusive relationship, the best way to protect your heart is to date several men.

And keep this in mind:

Rejection is all about your mindset.

Yes, it does hurt when someone rejects you.

But every time you meet a man and he “rejects” you or disappears, that’s okay. It means you don’t have to waste time with him and you’re one step closer to finding your Mr. Right.

Key Points: Why A Man Vanishes Or Disappears

1. Ask questions before meeting a man – his answers to your questions might give you clues regarding his availability and desire for a relationship.

2. Find out how long he’s been divorced or widowed or how long he’s been single. Ask him how long his past relationships have been. If they’re short relationships he could be a player or a commitment-phobe.

3. Be feminine. Don’t wear work clothes to a date. Let him take the lead. Let him do things for you.

4. Be fun. Avoid asking him questions that turn him off and make him feel like he’s in a job interview.

5. There is always a reason why a man disappears or vanishes. You might never know that reason but if it’s happening a lot you’re either not asking the right questions to “qualify” a man or you’re doing something that turns men off.

6. When he disappears or vanishes you’re one step closer to meeting Mr. Right.

If you’re…

> Frustrated with dating

> Frustrated with men pulling away

> Confused when a man doesn’t commit

…then click this link for the Girl Gets Great Guy System which shows you how to find a QUALITY man and enjoy a relationship that is loving, romantic, and passionate.

how to find mr right – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank Margesil for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: Beautiful rose image 1340448 courtesy of Margesil at Photo by margesil on

Flirting Techniques

“Flirting techniques are some of the easiest and simplest ways to attract a cute guy’s attention. Be sure to practice your flirting techniques every opportunity you can get.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coachsunset

Knowing how to flirt is one of the most powerful ways to attract a guy.

Flirting is about coming across to a man as interesting, fun, and unique. It can even have mysterious undertones to it.

It can drive a guy crazy…in a good way.

Because it gets him interested in you and thinking about you.

Best of all, many flirting techniques can be done without saying a word!

Sometimes there is just no better way of getting a man’s attention than by flirting.

As I’ve said in the Girl Gets Great Guy System, there really is a man out there for you.

You just have to find him.

That means you don’t pass up an opportunity to connect with someone you find attractive.

Flirting is simply being yourself and showing your personality in a way that makes a guy interested in you.

You want to get his attention and see where it leads – hopefully it will lead to being asked out on a date so you can get to know him better.

Have you ever gone to a party or function and seen a woman with men vying for her attention? Chances are you have. And chances are you’ve noticed that in many cases she’s not the most beautiful woman in the room.

She has something about her that instantly attracts guys to her.

And that quality is that she’s perfected her flirting skills.

She’s fun to be with and guys like to be with her because she makes them feel good about themselves.

Flirting is your way of taking the initiative instead of waiting for the guy to make the first move.

Some flirting techniques are subtle signals that encourage a man to approach you.

Because, let’s be honest, as macho as many guys like to think they are, they still fear being rejected by an attractive woman like you.

Flirting 101 – The Smile

One of the most effective ways to flirt is with a smile.

If a guy shows an interest in you, your smile will signal to him that you’re interested in him.

If he picks up on that signal and approaches you, it’s a wonderful opportunity to get to know him to see if you’re interested in him.

It could lead to a date and even to a committed relationship.

And it all starts with flirting.

How To Attract Men Table of Contents
What To Avoid Doing On The First Date | Internet Dating Scams | Best Online Dating Services

Other Flirting Techniques

There are many ways to flirt apart from smiling at a man.

For example, casually touching his arm as you’re talking to him or complimenting him in a flattering way are two other very effective flirting techniques.

Show your interest in him and bond with him by casually touching his arm as you’re talking to him:

Do this if you’re sharing a joke or letting him in on something like a tip or a secret or a confidence if you’re just trying to keep his attention.

Casually touching his arm is a more intimate gesture but it’s an instant way to bond with him.

And it signals that you like him and you’re interested in him.

(Keep in mind, though, that what is considered flirting – and totally innocent fun – in one country can be considered offensive – especially for religious reasons – in another country and could even lead to arrest. You should also be mindful of the fact that some men can interpret your flirting (including lightly touching his arm) as being sexually available – which should not be your intent when you meet someone new.)

Tossing your hair or running your fingers through your hair can also be flirting signals. They are ways to draw a man’s attention to you and can be effective when you combine them with a smile.

The Indirect Flirting Approach

The Indirect Approach is particularly effective when you’re out doing something, having fun, and you notice a cute guy you’re dying to talk to.

You need to be a happy, bubbly, and fun to make this work to your advantage.

That’s important because he then sees you as a fun person because you are having fun!

Your approach is to include him in what you’re doing in some way.

You can do this in one of several ways…

It might be to make a joke.

It might be to challenge him teasingly.

It might be as simple as saying to him, “I think I need to improve my (basketball) skills or technique.” and laughing at the same time.

 Best Places To Flirt

 An English study performed by The Social Issues Research Centre in 2004 found that the following were some of the best places to flirt:

1. Workplace

2. Bars, pubs, night clubs

3. Racetracks

4. Parties

5. Universities and colleges

6. Academic and business conferences

7. Sports and hobbies (except those sports where participants are serious competitors)

8. Internet (chat rooms, instant messaging)

Two key commonalities with the above places is a shared experience or a fun environment.

Don’t let the above list deter you from flirting in other places, though.

You have to actively look for opportunities to use your flirting skills.

Build Your Confidence In Flirting

You can’t build confidence in flirting and approaching men without practice.

Because practice and confidence go hand in hand when it comes to flirting.

So get out there and flirt.

Initiate conversations.

Talk to all types of guys – whether they’re married or not.

And whether they’re your “type” or not.

Your objective is to hone your flirting skills because one day you’ll need them for a guy you’re interested in meeting and getting to know better.

Guys who are interested in you will respond to your flirts and advances. Don’t get discouraged if a cute guy doesn’t respond – there may be a valid reason including he’s in a relationship or not ready for a relationship.

Blaine Barrington is a Dating and Relationship coach who helps single women find their Mr. Right. He’s the author of the Girl Gets Great Guy System – The System That Cracks The “Guy Code” And Helps You Find The Man Of Your Dreams.

Language of Desire – HOT!

The Secret Is Out: NAUGHTY Words Can Make Your Man Sexually Addicted To You. Ignite Your Love Life and Put More Passion In Your Lovemaking! (Very popular adult content.)

Click The Following Link For The Language of Desire – the site that gives relationship and dating advice to women and helps them find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank Johnny Nyberg for the beautiful photo in this article. Photo by johnnyberg on

The Top Relationship Killer When You’re Over 35 – The Bonding Trap

“Sometimes it’s what you say on the first date or two that will hurt your chances for a promising relationship. Be mindful of what you say!” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coachhearts2

I’ve talked about this before in Why He Disappeared.

But it’s such an important topic that I thought I’d revisit it in case you missed my previous article (which you can read here.)

I’d like to talk about how you can sabotage a promising relationship before it even gets off the ground. And it usually happens on the first or second date.

It’s what I call the Bonding Trap.

It’s an easy trap to fall into and you have to be aware of it.

As a dating and relationship coach for women over 35 I see this quite often with single women who are dating in their 30’s, 40’s, 50’s and older and looking for a relationship.

The Bonding Trap is where you share “information” about yourself to bond and get closer to the guy you’ve just met.

Relationship Baggage

We all have some sort of relationship baggage. It could be divorce, abuse, a sexually transmitted disease, a broken heart, or cheating, for example.

After all, by the time you reach 35 you’ve had a fair amount of life experience.

You’ve dated.

You’ve broken up with men.

You might have been married and divorced.

You might have had difficult or abusive relationships.

You might have children.

And when you meet a promising new man, you want him to know the real you.

There’s the mistaken belief that by sharing your relationship baggage, you’re “bonding” with the guy and getting closer to him. (And it’s not just women who fall into this trap. Men fall into it as well.)

Problem is, it scares him off.

It’s too early. And it’s too much information.

When he asks a question like, “When was your last relationship?” or “What happened in your marriage?” or “How come you’re single, you’re so beautiful?” or “Do you date a lot?” many women feel it’s the opportunity to “tell the truth” and reveal every sordid detail (that usually stems from bitterness, hurt, anger, or disappointment) about their past relationship or divorce or dating experiences.

Don’t be surprised if he asks you about your past relationship – it’s one of the most common questions asked.

And be prepared with an answer that doesn’t turn him off or scare him away.

Of course, you’re not just restricted to relationship baggage.

How To Attract Men Table of Contents
What To Avoid Doing On The First Date | Internet Dating Scams | Best Online Dating Services

Life Baggage

Your life plays a role, too.

I call it your life baggage.

This includes….

> Your financial problems like debt or bankruptcy.

> Your health problems like diabetes or high blood pressure or a chronic illness or therapy sessions with your psychologist.

> Your sexual issues like low libido or, alternatively, a high libido.

> Your family issues such as divorced parents, an alcoholic father or mother, a family member in prison, or estrangement from your children.

> Your self-image and low self-esteem issues like thinking you’re not attractive enough, or you’re not sexy enough, or you’re too fat or too skinny or your boobs aren’t big enough.

> Your overall personality and demeanor including your sense of humor, your nature, and your honesty.

> Your addictions like drugs or alcoholism which you’re struggling with or have overcome.

> Your career problems like being fired or being unable to hold onto jobs.

> Your minor or major brushes with the law including speeding tickets or driving under the influence.

> Your beliefs about men, dating, and relationships because they can hide unresolved anger issues from past failed relationships.

For example, you might believe – based on your personal experience or what has happened to one of your close friends – that all men are liars or cheaters.

And during the date you make a comment that you’re willing to bet that the new guy you’ve just met is like all other men and that he lies or cheats.

Can you guess his reaction when he hears that? And can you guess who won’t get asked out on a second date after making a statement like that?

When you open up about your past too soon, you’re making a grave error.

It’s not sexy. It’s very unflattering. And it’s definitely a turn off.

Instead of bonding and bringing you and your new guy closer, it becomes alarming to him.

It sets off alarm bells and changes the upbeat mood of the date.

The mood and the date become much too serious way too soon.

He wonders what he’s gotten himself into…or what he could be getting himself into.

He wonders if he wants to be involved in your life with its unique set of problems and issues when he has his own to contend with too.

He begins to think…

> Does he want to meet your parents if one of them is an alcoholic?

> Does he want a sex kitten with a high libido when he’s slowing down and needs prescription medication to satisfy a woman?

> Does he want to help you through your debt or bankruptcy problems when he has his own money and an impeccable financial track record?

> Does he want a woman who is needy, clingy, sarcastic, and dishonest when what he is looking for is a woman who is confident, assured, sweet, and honest?

> Does he want to be involved with you when you share custody of your children and your ex shows up at the door every week with them so you can spend a few hours or have an overnight visit with them?

> Does he want to take the chance that you’ll get hooked on drugs again or fall off the wagon and be inebriated when he comes home from work every day?

Don’t get me wrong, here. I’m not saying to lie or mislead someone.

What I’m suggesting is that you pick the right time to tell someone about certain details about your life that are private.

Let him get to know you a little. And give yourself a chance to get to know him.

Don’t flood him with all the bad news right at the beginning.

If there is a connection then he’s more likely to accept your “baggage.”

After all, he has baggage too.

And he can probably relate to some of your issues.

But when he meets you, he’s looking for someone who is fun to be with, not someone who dumps all of her problems on him like it’s a therapy session.

As the relationship progresses and you go on more dates, these things will usually become more apparent as you talk about various parts of your life.

When you meet someone new, you’re looking for similarities and common interests or experiences to establish a bond. That’s normal.

Don’t be in a rush to share your baggage and dump it all on him on the first date or two – it can turn a guy off quickly and ruin a promising relationship.

If you find the conversation moving into dangerous “baggage territory” then steer things in another direction and keep the conversation upbeat and fun.

Blaine Barrington is a Dating and Relationship coach who helps single women find their Mr. Right. He’s the author of the Girl Gets Great Guy System – The System That Cracks The “Guy Code” And Helps You Find The Man Of Your Dreams.

The Girl Gets Great Guy System is for the woman who wants to find her one true love.

It’s for the woman who:

– Is longing for a loving relationship
– Never seems to be able to keep a good man for long
– Always seems to pick losers and deadbeats
– Wants to have more dates with quality men

Click the following link to find out more about the Girl Gets Great Guy System

How To Get A Boyfriend – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank photographer – kirsche222 – for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: Hearts photo by kirsche222 on free images

When You Shouldn’t Give A Guy A Second Chance

“Sometimes the guy you meet is Mr. Wrong right from the get go. It’s part of dating and something you have to go through to find your Mr. Right.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Advice how to get a guy to like you -

In one of my articles I mentioned that many women are too picky and that they don’t give (nice) guys a chance.

They make snap decisions and turn away guys who could be perfect for them.

That’s not to say that every guy you meet will be right for you.

There’s ONE special guy out there who hasn’t yet found you.

In the meantime, you’ll date a lot of nice – and not-so-nice – guys before you find your Mr. Right.

What Would Make You Turn Down A Second Date With A Guy?

Imagine this dating scenario….

You met this guy online.

He seems nice.

You both have things in common.

He makes you laugh.

He asks you out on a date.

And you say, “Yes!”

You meet at a restaurant.

You sit down.

And you start talking.

It’s back and forth, question after question.

And then, as you gather more information about this guy, you start to see patterns emerge that send up red flags.

Things like…

>> “Do you mind if I smoke?” (OMG. He smokes. Ewwww. He never told me that!)

>> “My divorce just got finalized. I’m so glad I’m free. I’ll never marry again.” (Huh? I thought you wanted a relationship?)

>> “I’m not close to my kids. I haven’t spoken to them in a few years.” (What’s wrong with you if even your kids don’t like you?)

>> “I’ll have another drink, please.” (I’m not counting but isn’t this his fifth drink?)

>> “Come on, have another drink with me.” (Looks like he needs a drinking buddy, not a partner.)

>> “I live with a roommate and we share expenses. I’ve been “between jobs” for a few years now.” (Translation: He’s unemployed. Maybe even unemployable. But sometimes, this isn’t a deal breaker – it just depends on the circumstances. He might be an entrepreneur who just sold his stake in a company for millions of dollars and he’s looking for the next idea to start a company.)

>> “I’ve been divorced two times. Marriage never seems to work out.” (Oh? Why is that?)

>> “How many one night stands have you had?” (I’m flabbergasted that you’re even asking me that question)

>> “I’ve had 100 first dates. Never seem to get past the first date with women.” (There has to be a reason, don’t you think?)

>> “I’ve never married. Actually I’m looking for someone who is in her 30’s. You seem a bit old to me.” (Then why did you ask me out?)

>> “I think I retired too early. Not much money left. But I sure enjoy being a beach bum.” (Good news! There are some wealthy beach bums out there. He’s just not one of them.)

>> “So you don’t think I look like my photos on my online dating profile? They were taken about 15 years ago.” (Does he look better now or then? And if he looks better now, why wouldn’t he post those photos? Perhaps he’s playing with you.)

>> “Yeah, I’ve put on a little (!) weight since the photos I showed on my profile.” (Liar. That’s a lot of weight.)

>> “Well, everybody exaggerates their height in online dating profiles. Heck, if I had told you I was only 5 feet 5 inches would you have gone out with me? (Maybe. Maybe not. Why not charm me with your personality and we’ll see where things go.)

>> “So how do you like my unshaven, scruffy look? I thought I’d show you my rugged side.” (Not very impressive when he doesn’t clean up for his date. But don’t be fooled. He could really be a millionaire who wants to find a woman who likes him for who he is, not for his money.)

>> “I have a few health issues I didn’t mention to you when we were chatting. Heart problems. Bit of a problem in the bedroom, too. Is that a deal breaker with you?” (What exactly are you trying to say here, buddy?”)

>> “I said in my dating profile that I was looking for a long term relationship. But I’m really happier with a Friends With Benefits arrangement.” (I’m out of here.)

>> “I have a confession. I’m really 65, not 55.” (Really?!? As if I couldn’t tell. Why did you lie?)

>> “I hang out with a lot of celebrities. You know…like (name of celebrity) and (name of celebrity).” (Am I supposed to be impressed?)

>> “I actually live in San Diego. Thought I’d widen the scope when looking for someone.” (Oh? San Diego’s a pretty big city. It must have some eligible women. Besides, I don’t want to drive for two hours for a date.)

Many of these are red flags that shouldn’t be ignored.

And they indicate he’s not the type of guy you’re looking for.

How To Attract Men Table of Contents
Places To Meet Single Men | Why He Disappeared | Attracting Mr. Right

Top 4 Deal Breakers

Obviously your deal breakers shouldn’t be frivolous. They have to be major things that affect a relationship.

These can include…

1. He Blames Others For His Misfortunes – Especially When It Comes To Dating And Relationships

This guy is pretty easy to spot.

Because he’ll soon unburden himself on you…looking for your sympathy.

He’s the type of guy who doesn’t take responsibility for his own actions…or the outcome of those actions.

Everyone else is to blame for what has happened to him.

His wife didn’t understand him.

His boss doesn’t understand him.

His kids don’t understand him.

2. He Doesn’t Show You He’s Interested In You And He Doesn’t Try To Please You

If he’s interested in you he should be trying to please you in some way.

Instead, it’s all about him.

There are lots of ways a man can show his interest in you without going overboard.

He might not send you a dozen roses with a love note every day but he’s considerate and tries to make you happy in other ways…

He chooses your favorite restaurant.

He does your laundry or mows your lawn while you’re at work.

He takes you to that chick flick you’ve been dying to see.

He cooks a surprise dinner for you when you’ve had a hard day at work.

3. He’s Into Himself, Not You

This type of guy is self centered…and selfish.

Everything is about him.

And he comes first.

He talks about himself and doesn’t get to know you.

You’d think he’d at least show some interest in you by asking you questions and learning more about who you are as a person.

That’s kind of important when it comes to being involved with someone.

4. He’s A Liar (Or A Game Player)

It’s the little lies that start the ball rolling.

The lie about his age.

The lie about his relationship status. (A definite deal breaker if he’s married.)

The lie about his weight…or height.

What else has he told you that isn’t true?

Or he likes to “test” you…to see how you react.

He tests your reaction to things he does or tells you.

It’s not a good way to start out any relationship.

And dating and relationships aren’t about “testing” the other person. It’s about having a connection.

There are going to be times when you make a hasty decision about a guy – and it’s going to be wrong. Because he’s a nice guy who will make someone a wonderful partner.

But there will be times when you just know in your heart of hearts that the guy sitting across for you just isn’t the type of guy you could see spending the rest of your life with.

Look for the signs that he shows you – either directly or indirectly.

And if he’s wrong for you, move on to the next guy.

Blaine Barrington is a Dating and Relationship coach who helps single women find their Mr. Right. He’s the author of the Girl Gets Great Guy System – The System That Cracks The “Guy Code” And Helps You Find The Man Of Your Dreams.

The Girl Gets Great Guy System is for the woman who wants to find her one true love.

It’s for the woman who:

– Is longing for a loving relationship
– Never seems to be able to keep a good man for long
– Always seems to pick losers and deadbeats
– Wants to have more dates with quality men

Click the following link to find out more about the Girl Gets Great Guy System

How To Get A Boyfriend – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank Reuben4eva for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: Pretty and Pink (c) Photo by reuben4eva on

Why You Get Discouraged With Dating After 40

“One of the biggest issues you’ll have with dating after 40 is waiting around for that guy you met – or went on a date with – to call you.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach love heart

No doubt about it. It can be discouraging when you wait for a guy to call you…and he doesn’t.

It was bad enough when you were younger waiting around for that dreamy boy in school or college to phone you.

But when you’re dating after 40 (or older) it seems even worse.

And there’s a reason for that…

The pool of eligible men shrinks more and more as you mature.

So it’s harder to find a quality man to have a relationship with.

And it can be more than that.

You’re at a point in your life where you’re more mature and more established. You know what you want.

Trouble is, you want “it” now. And “it” is a great relationship with a wonderful man.

You don’t want to wait.

Which Of These Dating Situations Have You Experienced?

Of all the problems women have with dating after 40, it’s the “Why doesn’t he call?” question that I see the most often.

Why he doesn’t call can be part of why he disappeared after a date (and never called again, even though his parting words were, “I’ll call you.”)

Or it can be why he didn’t call when he said he would…but eventually phones you.

Or it could be why he didn’t call when you expect him to.

I’ve already discussed why he disappears after a date and you don’t hear from him again.

It could be something you said or did that turned him off.

Or it could be something about him that makes him decide not to pursue you or a relationship with you.

There can be legitimate reasons why he doesn’t call when he said he would – and they might not have anything to do with you at all.

His reason could be work related.

It could be family related. There may be a family emergency or an illness in the family.

You have to keep in mind that at the very beginning of a relationship or when you’ve just met a guy, you’re not usually his priority unless he doesn’t have much of a life.

In most cases, you’re a small part of his busy life at this point.

He has his work, his friends, his activities, and his family – all of which (unfortunately) take priority over you.

The “I’ll Call You” Scenario In Dating

Let’s say, for example, he said in a casual sort of way that he’d call and you haven’t heard from him.

Two days later…no call.

Five days later…no call.

A week later…you pick up the phone…and it’s him.

Or here’s another real life scenario…

You “meet” a great guy online.

You email each other.

You message each other.

You talk on the phone.

And you get into a routine to go online each night to either message each other or talk on Skype.

It’s usually a pre-established time but if you don’t happen to make arrangements beforehand you still go on and he’s there waiting for you.

Only something happens one evening…

And he’s not waiting for you.

In fact, you can see that he’s online but he hasn’t come on to say “hi” to you or to “talk” to you.

Do You Say Things Like This When You’re Discouraged With Dating?

What is going through your mind when you don’t hear from him?

Probably things like….

> I knew he was too good to be true.

> Nobody loves me.

> I’m being dumped again.

> I’m not attractive enough to have a man in my life.

> I did something wrong that screwed up a promising relationship.

> I feel like a failure.

> I feel all alone.

And then you get mad at him.

You feel he has disrespected you.

You feel that you’ve been rejected.

You now accept that there won’t be a relationship.

Or, if you’ve been dating him for a short while, that the relationship is over.

After all, you think, if he really cared about me he wouldn’t leave me hanging. He could have at least picked up the phone.

And you nurse your wounds by saying you don’t need a man in your life.

Is Something Really Wrong With The Relationship?

It’s very easy to get into this negative thinking when in fact, there might be nothing wrong at all – at least from his point of view.

He may genuinely be busy and doesn’t want to phone you until his schedule is clear so he can ask you out.

Or he may want to give you your space not knowing that you miss him and you want to see as much of him as you can.

This isn’t about making excuses for him. It’s about taking a different perspective on things.

Let me ask you this:

If you were busy in your life, with your work, friends, family, and activities, would it matter so much if he didn’t call you within a day or so?

Chances are it wouldn’t.

Because you’d be busy. Your mind would be occupied with other things.

You’d let this promising relationship progress naturally – the way it’s supposed to progress.

Too often we’re in a rush to escalate a relationship instead of taking our time.

If you don’t hear from him and he disappears from your life then he’s done you a favor because he’s not right for you.

He’s saved you wasting time on him. So now you can move onto the next man.

You’re disappointed, of course.

You might have even had your heart set on this man.

So you’re feeling heartbroken.

But be thankful you didn’t waste months or years on him if he’s not ready for a committed relationship.

If you didn’t have much invested in the relationship you’ll get over your hurt quickly and you’ll be able to move on.

How To Attract Men Table of Contents
Places To Meet Single Men | Internet Dating Scams | Attracting Mr. Right

How A Smart Woman Reacts When A Guy Says He’ll Call And He Takes Longer Than Expected


…how do you react to his call when he does phone you (or in the online example, when he messages you)?

This really is the moment of truth.

This is where many women make a huge mistake.

And they kill any hope of a relationship.

By this time they’re all wound up and ready to lash back at him.

They’ve worked themselves into such a state of mind that they’re not thinking clearly.

All they want to do is lash back and make him feel bad about not phoning sooner.

So this is your opportunity to show him how you’re different from other women.

If you give him a hard time, he’ll either back off, distance himself, and eventually disappear.

Or, he’ll immediately be out of there.

You won’t hear from him again.

If you’re cold to him, he’s going to wonder what he did wrong.

And he’ll retreat.

He’s going to feel thankful that he found out about your true personality and how you treat him before things got more serious.

But if you’re cheerful and let him know you’re glad to hear from him, he’ll not only be surprised and pleased, he’ll immediately see that you’re not like other women he’s dated.

And that can be a good thing because it could lead to a wonderful, fulfilling relationship.

This is all about mindset and how you see things.

It’s about thinking positively instead of negatively.

What To Do When He Doesn’t Call

You now know what to do if he takes his time calling you.

So let’s recap what to do in the three situations I’ve described:

1. He disappears after you had an amazing date with him?

So what?

Sure it hurts.

Sure it makes you sad.

Sure it makes you mad.

But…it’s his loss, not yours.

There are other guys out there who are looking for a smart, attractive woman like you.

2. He doesn’t call when you says he’ll call?

So what?

Live your life.

Stay busy.

Don’t focus on one man.

If he calls then make him feel welcome instead of scolding him and making him feel bad.

3. He doesn’t call when you think he should.

So what?

He doesn’t know when he “should” call you based on your “rules.”

Throw away those “rules” if you have any.

Do things you enjoy.

Keep your mind focused on other things in your life, not just one man.

It all boils down to living your life…and what your expectations are.

Because reality is, he hasn’t made a commitment to you. He isn’t part of your life…yet.

Right now he’s nothing more than a prospective boyfriend or partner.

If you are in a relationship, talk to him. Let him know what would be nice, not what you demand from him.

If you keep that in mind you’ll shield your heart from hurt and live a happier life.

And you’ll increase your chances of ending up in a happy relationship with a great guy because you won’t have turned him off with an attitude that scares guys away.

Why you get discouraged with dating after 40 is because you haven’t yet found anyone and you’re not in a loving relationship. But there’s no reason to let that overshadow your search for a quality guy and ruin your chance to have a wonderful man in your life.

Don’t get hung up on the “I’ll call you” promise that guys make.

If they do call you that’s an opportunity to see if things can go further.

If they don’t call you, that’s okay. You have a life to live and other guys to pursue.

As long as you keep busy, don’t focus solely on one guy in the beginning, and don’t let negative thoughts creep in, you’ll be fine.

And you’ll attract men who want to be with you and who want to please you.

Blaine Barrington is a Dating and Relationship coach who helps single women find their Mr. Right. He’s the author of the Girl Gets Great Guy System – The System That Cracks The “Guy Code” And Helps You Find The Man Of Your Dreams.

The Girl Gets Great Guy System is for the woman who has experienced any of the following:

– Is longing for a loving relationship
– Has had her heart broken too many times
– Intimidates men without meaning to
– Always seems to pick losers and deadbeats
– Wants to have more dates with quality men – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank tijmen van dobbenburgh for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: Love you (c) tijmen van dobbenburgh Image #510909 Photo by tijmen on

Why He Disappeared

girlgetsgreatguy white roses

“You will encounter all types of men who seem perfect for you. Their actions will speak louder than their words.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach

Have you ever met a man where you thought, “You had me at ‘hello’” – where you thought he was interesting and maybe even perfect for you?

It’s not unusual to meet a guy who at first blush seems almost too perfect to be true.

He’s good looking. He’s charming. He’s fun to be with. He’s attentive. He says all the right things a girl wants to hear.

The Perfect Date

He takes you on a date.

He wines and dines you.

The setting is romantic.

You look into each other’s eyes and smile at each other.

There seems like an unspoken message that passes between the two of you.

You might even be impulsive and grab his hand and give it a squeeze to show you like him even though you only met a few hours ago.

The date eventually comes to an end.

You hug him.

You give him a little kiss.

As he is leaving he says, “I’ll call you.”

And you’re thrilled to hear him say those three words.

To you, they promise a future with a great guy.

You go home and dream about him.

You replay the date over and over again.

You fantasize about what your future would look like with him.

It’s like having a teenage crush on the boy at school.

The Waiting Game – It’s Part Of Dating

And now you wait to hear from this new man in your life.

A day passes.

“He must be busy,” you think.

You might even start cancelling plans you had with friends for fear of missing his phone call or not being available to see him.

Then two days go by.

“I wonder why I haven’t heard from him?” you say to yourself as that little panicky feeling starts to set in.

On the third day you begin to come to the realization that he might not phone you.

Finally a week has gone by.

No phone call.

No email.

No text messages.


With a sinking feeling you now realize you aren’t going to hear from him again.

And then you get discouraged…and sad.

And you start questioning yourself.

Here you thought you were attractive and fun to be with (which you are) and he had a good time with you and he doesn’t phone you even though he promised he would.

Are You Looking For Answers When He Doesn’t Call?

By this time you’re not replaying the date so much as you’re looking for answers why he didn’t phone you.

> Did you do something wrong that turned him off?

> Did he really like you or was he only pretending to like you?

> Why would he say he’d call if he had no intention to do so?

> Should you wait to hear from him before you look for someone else?

And you might be thinking things like…

> Why does this always happen to me?

> I’m going to give up on dating.

These are the things that probably go through your mind after going on a great date and being disappointed when the guy doesn’t phone you.

Why He Didn’t Call You

Let’s examine what happened and what you can do about it.

First, you will never know what really happened.

He might have had cold feet or not felt any chemistry.

He might have had second thoughts about wanting to date you or about even being in a relationship.

He might have been turned off by things you said or did.

He might have found someone else he was interested in.

He might have been married or in a relationship.

He might have had a situation – family or work – come up that meant he couldn’t phone you when he planned to. And then he got embarrassed that so much time had passed and was afraid to phone you. Because in his experience he’ll get a cold reception and be made to feel like a jerk for taking so long to phone.

Do you see how the possible explanations can go on and on?

He might have genuinely liked you and in the moment he promised to call you.

Or…which is just as likely, he said, “I’ll call you” as a way of parting so things wouldn’t be awkward.

It could be his way of saying he’s not interested without coming out and saying those exact words and hurting you.

After all, “I’ll call you” is totally different from “Are you free on Saturday night?” or “I’d like to see you again. When are you free?”

In fact, if a guy does say to you, “I’ll call you” take it with a grain of salt and start onto the next guy in your dating funnel. Because chances are he won’t phone. If he does, that’s great. If he doesn’t it’s no big deal.

Did You Do Something That Turned Him Off?

Maybe you did do or say something that turned him off.

Maybe you revealed too much information to him about your abusive ex or about your health or about your sex life or about your sad childhood or how you don’t speak to your siblings or to your grown up children.

Maybe you didn’t want to appear needy so you told him you’re independent and you don’t really need a man in your life.

Maybe you have four cats and he’s allergic to cats.

Maybe you didn’t dress appropriately and tried to squeeze into an outfit that wasn’t very flattering.

If you did turn him off somehow, you will never know…unless, of course, you already know that you said or did something that you wish you hadn’t (and you’re mentally kicking yourself for doing it).

What you need to realize is that when you first meet a guy, you shouldn’t – and definitely don’t – commit with all of your heart.

It’s not love at first sight.

You don’t know this guy.

Even if you’ve traded emails and phone calls and text messages for weeks before you meet, you still don’t know who he is.

And what’s happened is that you’ve invested your feelings in one guy who you don’t know anything about in real life.

Your first meetings and dates are where you find out if you like him.

This is the discovery period where you get to know him.

It’s not the time where you commit to him.

Remember, relationships take time – even if you have been emailing and chatting before you met.

You’re not in an instant relationship just because he’s no longer someone you talk to “online” and you’ve now met him in person.

How To Approach Dating

This is where men approach dating a little differently that women.

Men go on a date thinking, “Let’s see if she’s nice and whether I like her.”

Women go on a date thinking, “I wonder if he’s The One.”

Do you see how very different those two ways of thinking are?

Men can shrug off disappointment easier with their expectation. Women, on the other hand, set themselves up for hurt – especially when they pin all of their hopes and dreams on one guy.

In the meantime, you’ve been putting off meeting other guys.

And, instead, you’ve been caught up in self doubt and hurt because this one date that you pinned everything on didn’t work out.

Avoid Doing This When Dating

What do you do to avoid this in the future?

First, you change your expectations.

Your expectations should be to get to know the guy to see if he’s boyfriend material.

Secondly, you avoid concentrating all of your efforts on one guy.

Have a couple of other guys in the background and get to know them too.

Don’t pin all of your hopes on one guy only to discover he’s not the one for you.

Yes, he looked promising.

But in reality you knew nothing about the guy in real life.

And it doesn’t matter what he’s told you in emails or phone calls, you really don’t know this man until you’re with him and you talk to him and you spend time with him and get to know him.

I realize how hard this is for many women. (It happens to guys too.)

It’s especially difficult if there aren’t a lot of good prospects out there.

If you “met” online, then chances are you revealed things to him that you haven’t told other people.

You might be a little embarrassed about what you said to him.

You might have even flirted a little with him and said racy things and gotten a little carried away.

How To Shield Yourself From Dating Disappointment

There’s only one way to shield yourself from major disappointment and hurt.

And that’s to not concentrate on just one guy.

As the saying goes, have more than one iron in the fire.

That’s not cheating or being unfaithful.

You’re not in an exclusive relationship with this guy.

He hasn’t committed to you and you haven’t committed to him.

If one guy doesn’t work out, so what?

You explore things with the next guy.

And the next.

Until you find the guy who’s right for you.

Be smart about dating.

Be brave.

Stay strong.

And stay the course.

Because you will find your Mr. Right.

Click here to increase your chances of finding YOUR Mr. Right or Soulmate. – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank Kirkman for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: White roses photo by kirkman on

Dating Advice For Women – Attracting Mr. Right

“There are lots of good men out there waiting for a loving relationship. You just have to find that one man who is ideal for you.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach dating advice for women - attracting mr. right

No dating advice for women would be complete without shattering a myth that many women hold onto.

Because one of the most common comments many women make is that there are no good men left. Or that they can’t find their Mr. Right.

The truth is, there are LOTS of good men out there.

The problem many women have is that they don’t know how to find the guy who’s right for them.

They might know how to attract a man but they don’t know how to attract the RIGHT type of man.

Sometimes that’s because they make the same mistakes over and over.

Other times they give up hope – or they’re afraid – because they were in a bad relationship before and don’t want to repeat that experience.

And what happens is that they close up and are unapproachable.

Not only that, but they’re not open to finding a great guy simply because they’ve convinced themselves that there are no good men left.

Know What You Need From A Relationship

This is entirely different than what you “want” from a relationship.

Needs are the essential things in a relationship that make you happy with the guy of your dreams.

For example, you might want to retire early.

But you need a guy who is loving and caring.

Your “want” is something that would be nice to have. But it’s not critical to having a wonderful relationship.

Know What Type Of Man You’re Looking For

Many women end up with the wrong type of guy simply because they really don’t know what they’re looking for in a man.

And sometimes they’re attracted and drawn to a specific “type” of guy – even knowing that he’s not relationship material.

For example, some women are attracted to the bad boy because he offers fun and adventure. But he might not be long term boyfriend material simply because he dates women for a short time before moving on.

Write down the top qualities and attributes you desire in a man.

You might, for example, be looking for a tall guy. Or a guy who has a college or university degree. Or a guy who is into biking, and mountain climbing, and skiing.

And, you might want a man who is caring and understanding. Or you might want a man who is loving and who “gets” you.

Once you have your list of top qualities and attributes, decide on those things that are the most important.

You have to know what is important to you. These are the things that will make you happy in a relationship.

Once you’ve finished doing that, keep an open mind.

Be open to the possibility that the guy you are looking for or who you will eventually meet could be much better than the man you’re looking for.

How To Attract Men Table of Contents
Places To Meet Single Men | Internet Dating Scams | Best Online Dating Services

Go Where The Guys Hang Out

There’s no use saying there are no good men left if you don’t go out and meet new guys.

You have to take action here – go to places where the type of guys you want are hanging out.

That might be the gym. That might be the grocery store or supermarket. That might be a specific class at college. That might be a bar or pub or tavern.

It might be a cafe or deli or coffee shop. It might be a sports field or a hardware store.

It might even be a specific department in the company you work for.

Talk To New Guys

Sure, guys might approach you and chat you up.

But, again, you have to take action – especially if you see a guy you’re attracted to.

This is about striking up a conversation.

That might strike fear in your heart – to approach a guy you’re attracted to and start talking to him.

But how else are you going to know if he’s “The One” if you don’t do that if he doesn’t approach you first? Are you going to let a great guy get away simply because you were too afraid to talk to him?

Don’t make the mistake of thinking that the guy should make the first move. Sometimes you have to make the first move if you see an opportunity to get to know a great guy.

If you get tongue tied then start out with small steps and simply approach a guy – any guy – and ask for the time or for directions. Or make a comment and see what he says in return.

Keep it simple so you can build your confidence.

Most guys will be flattered that you spoke to them. And they will definitely take notice of you.

If they’re attracted to you they might even start asking you questions and get to know you better.

Give Him A Chance

One of the main reasons women don’t find a great guy is because they don’t give men a chance.

You shouldn’t jump to conclusions and think he’s not your type or there’s no chemistry without getting to know him better.

That’s why some women find the great guys while others keep searching all the time and wondering why they can’t find a good man.

You have to give things time. If he at least seems decent and not some creep then take the time to find out more about him.

You just might find that the guy you’ve been looking for is right under your nose and you never considered him before.

How To Attract A Man

Don’t waste your time with the wrong guy.

You could find yourself years older having wasted some of your best years if you pick a loser.

Instead, imagine finding a great guy with whom you can have an amazing relationship.

If you’re ready for love and you want to know where the great guys hang out and how to catch and keep one then the Girl Gets Great Guy System might be exactly what you need.

It also includes a fantastic checklist to help you decide whether you’ve chosen Mr.Right or whether you’re wasting your time.

If you want to find, catch, and keep a great guy then check out the Girl Gets Great Guy System.

The Girl Gets Great Guy System is for the woman who has experienced any of the following:

– Is longing for a loving relationship
– Has had her heart broken too many times
– Intimidates men without meaning to
– Always seems to pick losers and deadbeats
– Wants to have more dates with quality men – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank the following photographer for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: Heart 1 (c) Photo by takatuka on

Dating Advice For Women: Questions To Ask Men


“A date isn’t an interview or a confessional. You’re being judged on the things you say and do during a date. Leave a first good impression and your chances for a second date are much higher.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach

When it comes to dating advice for women, one of the first questions many women ask is what questions should I ask?

It’s a great question because when you’re getting to know someone who you’re interested in for a relationship it’s common to ask questions.

This is especially true with online dating where it’s easier to ask questions and not feel that you’re pressing too hard to get to the answers that are important to you.

But it can be a trap if you’re not careful. The questions you ask and the answers you give can turn a guy off.

Keep in mind that when you meet someone – online or offline – and you want to know something about them you don’t want to make it look like it’s an interview.

So you don’t ask things like, “What are your goals?” Or, “Where do you see yourself in 5 year’s time?” Or, “What are your strengths and weaknesses?”

Those aren’t the types of questions you ask – although some of that information may come about through casual conversation.

For example, he tells you what he does for a living. And then he says that in five year’s time he expects to be promoted to a higher position or move on to another job.

Instead of these “interview” type of questions, ask another type of question.

These are what I call initial “qualifiers” to see if it’s worthwhile moving forward with the guy you’re interested in.

Common questions from women – whether you’re on a date or you’re on an online dating site – can include the following:

1. Have You Ever Been Married?

These days “single” can mean never been married or divorced and no more ex in his life.

With online dating you’ll usually find a section about marital status.

Some guys have been married and divorced. Some men are widowers. Some are separated from their wife.

Others are married and looking for an affair or a no strings attached arrangement.

And others have never been married. They may be confirmed bachelors, they may be players, they may be smooth talkers, or they may not have found the woman they’re searching for.

2. Are You Seeing Anyone Right Now? [or] Do You Believe In Monogamy?

This question is sometimes disguised to mean whether he’s sleeping with anyone or whether he has a relationship with someone that he hasn’t disclosed.

This is a particularly important question since most people want to have an exclusive relationship.

With sexual disease prevalent, it’s not unusual to expect exclusivity in a relationship – especially if you’re intimate with a man.

If you ask, “Do you believe in monogamy?” it could reveal whether he’s sleeping with other women or wants to date a number of women instead of just one exclusively.

3. What Do You Do For A Living?

It’s common to ask this question. In fact, it’s probably one of the most frequently asked questions. The man you have your eye on may be a professional. He may be unemployed. He may be “between jobs.” He may be an entrepreneur. Or he may be underemployed or unemployable because of his age or for health reasons.

It will be up to you to decide which is acceptable to you. Some women don’t mind helping their man financially. Others have done it all their lives and are now looking for more security from a man who has a good job.

These days with housing and living costs so high, it’s nice to know that the man you’re dating has either a good job or has some financial resources to fall back on if the relationship progresses and especially if you decide to get married.

4. Tell Me About Your Family – Your Parent, Your Siblings, Your Children

We all like to know something about the other person’s family. After all, if things were to progress, you would eventually meet his family.

It’s also nice to know something about his relationship with his family. For example, is he close to his parents and his children.

If he’s an older man, it’s likely that his children are grown up and on their own. And sometimes that can be important in a budding relationship.

Some people like children but don’t want to raise any more children. So that could be a deal breaker for them when considering dating a man.

5. What Do You Like To Do For Fun?

This question will give you an idea about whether the guy you’re interested in is a fun guy. Whether he likes to travel. And whether the two of you have common interests.

It’s also interesting to know something about his passions, interests, hobbies, and how he spends his free time because it can open up new opportunities for things to do together.

Of course, if he’s into hang gliding or rock climbing or base jumping or bungy jumping or skydiving, he might be a little too adventurous for you.

Even worse, he might encourage you to take up extreme sports when you’re deathly afraid of them and prefer to have your feet firmly planted on the ground.

6. How Long Have You Lived In Your Town or City?

People move. And sometimes you’ll find a common town or city where you have both lived. Or you may have mutual friends from the same town or city.

It’s always easier to relate to someone if you have something in common or a shared experience.

7. Do You Drink, Smoke, Gamble, Or Use Non-Prescription and Prescription Drugs?

In other words, what sins do you like?

You don’t have to ask this question outright. For example, you could ask, “Have you ever been to Vegas?” or “Have you tried (name a casino)?”

In most cases, you’ll get some idea about a person’s “sins” on the first date or two. For example, he may order a lot of drinks if you’re at a restaurant. Or he might reveal his favorite pastime is getting together with the guys and drinking. Or he may excuse himself to go outside for a quick smoke.

Most online dating sites have a section for this so you can see what a man’s habits are.

And if you’re looking for someone who doesn’t smoke or do drugs and is a light drinker then it’s important that you know right from the beginning so you can qualify or disqualify him as a potential romantic candidate.

Drugs can be a major issue – and a deal breaker – for many people.

Even prescription drugs can be a red flag since they can affect a person’s behavior and even their sexual performance.

8. What Are You Looking For In A Partner?

This is a great question to ask any man you’re interested in because it gives you an idea what his expectations are.

He might, for example, be looking for casual dating. Or a one-night stand. Or a friend with benefits.

He may be looking for a companion for social outings and travel. He might be looking for someone to talk to and do things with as an activity partner.

Or he might be looking for love and a long term relationship with the possibility of marriage if things work out.

Some guys might also tell you they’re not interested in raising any more children – especially if their own children are grown up. So, if you’re a single parent with young children, he probably isn’t a candidate for a relationship.

If he asks you the same question, it’s best to be candid about what you’re really looking for so as not to lead him on.

But you have to be careful how you answer. For example, if you say you’re looking for a husband it will very likely scare him off.

It’s best to keep it general in the beginning. Instead, you might say you’re looking for someone to enjoy fun times with and see if a relationship develops.

Of course, if you’re only looking for intimacy then it’s best to disclose that right at the beginning and say you’re looking for a lover or for a no strings attached arrangement.

If you’re only looking for a friend or companion then he may not be a good choice if he’s looking for a lover or a future wife.

Avoid the type of answer like “an honest man” or “a guy who isn’t a loser” or “a nice guy.” These types of answers can signal bitterness from previous bad experiences with men and can reflect poorly on you.

When asking questions you don’t want to appear as though you’re prying or trying to complete a man-catching checklist.

You want to keep things casual and light.

The trouble is that when you’re considering dating a guy, you want to know that your time is well invested and you don’t want any surprises that could be deal breakers.

On the other hand, you don’t want to turn the guy off with your probing questions.

Of course, the tables can be turned on you as the man asks you questions.

Questions like:

1. What Happened In Your Marriage?

This is a question that could still cause you pain or anger if you’re recently divorced and starting all over after many years of what you thought was a happy marriage until your ex-husband ran off with a younger woman.

And it’s up to you whether you want to go into the details. If your ex husband was a cheater or had an affair or multiple affairs it’s entirely appropriate to mention that. Or you can simply say you and your ex-husband grew apart or you fell out of love and only stayed together until the children were grown up.

2. How Old Are You?

Many online dating sites ask you to indicate your age. Most people are reasonably honest about this question.

Some women are embarrassed to think that they’re looking for a relationship in their later years when their dream was to be married all their lives to one man.

It used to be that a man would never ask a woman’s age.

But times have changed.

It’s your choice whether to tell him specifically how old you are.

If the relationship progresses he’ll want to at least know when your birthday is. Or he might allude to how old you are by making remarks about specific events in history – for example, when the Beatles came to America.

How To Attract Men Table of Contents
Places To Meet Single Men | Internet Dating Scams | Are You Too Picky

3. How Many Relationships Have You Had In The Past?

This is a cute way of asking how many men you’ve slept with.

It might even give him an idea of your experience as a sexual partner.

It’s not a question you need to answer or divulge.

It’s your personal business.

4. What Would You Do If You Found Out You Were Pregnant?

This is an oblique way of asking whether you’re sexually active and whether you use birth control.

It’s a question that eventually has to be answered if you’re intimate with the man you’re dating.

But as an initial question from someone you don’t know very well it’s up to you whether you answer it.

5. Do You Enjoy Sex?

For a lot of women sex questions are a turn off until they get to know a guy and think there is a connection.

Be prepared for this question from guys. Because, let’s face it, most guys are interested in sex in a relationship.

But use your common sense, too. It’s not a topic that should be encouraged in the beginning. If the question is asked in the first email or two – and you don’t know each other very well – then it’s inappropriate.

You should get to know each other first before delving into the “sex” questions which will include things like preferences, forbidden practices, birth control, condoms, sexually transmitted diseases, and being tested.

6. How Would Your Friends Describe You or What Would They Say About You?

It’s another great question. Generally you want to be able to bring out your good points about your personality and qualities.

It’s a tricky question because he might be looking for the negative qualities you have – you might get angry quickly or you might be a critical person. Or you might be jealous or you might be needy or desperate.

These qualities are guy turnoffs. And, in a guy, they’re very likely turnoffs for you too.

Obviously you want to put your best foot forward when answering questions from a prospective relationship candidate.

You want to keep things upbeat and positive. You don’t want your potential lover to wince and duck his head at the thought of being savagely mauled by your overprotective Chihuahua or the thought of the front door being smashed open by a jealous ex husband or boyfriend as your new lover has you in his arms making mad passionate love to you.

The thing to keep in mind with asking questions is that the answers to many of them will come as you get to know the man you’re interested in.

And be prepared for the answers you ask be asked of you.

Find The Man of Your Dreams Who Makes You Happy

Just as there are questions to avoid asking, there are also topics to avoid talking about.

In the Girl Gets Great Guy System – which is dating advice for women who want to find the man of their dreams – I not only show you how to ask questions without it seeming like he’s applying for a “position” in a job, I also cover 15 different topics to avoid discussing on the first date because they can change the mood and instantly turn guys off.

The Girl Gets Great Guy System is for the woman who wants to find her one true love. It’s for the woman who:

– Is longing for a loving relationship
– Never seems to be able to keep a good man for long
– Always seems to pick losers and deadbeats
– Wants to have more dates with quality men

Click the following link to find out more about the Girl Gets Great Guy System

How To Get A Boyfriend

How To Ruin A New Relationship

“Treat a new relationship gently – it could develop into a commitment that lasts a lifetime.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach. love hearts

You meet a guy and you’re really into him…and he’s really into you.

It looks promising.

He’s everything you ever wanted in a guy.

He’s fun.

He’s romantic.

He’s handsome.

He’s smart.

He’s a manly man.

And even though you’re in the infatuation stage where he can do no wrong, you think he might be The One.

But there are ways to spoil a budding relationship that showed so much promise.

And it’s a pity because a beginning relationship can be spoiled so quickly if it’s not nurtured properly.

Here are the top two ways to ruin what could be a promising relationship:

1. Playing Games

Playing games with a guy can be a huge turnoff.

And it’s one of the quickest ways to lose a guy.

Guys like to chase a woman.

They’re wired for it.

And the guy who is chasing you should be working to win your heart if he’s interested in you.

But don’t play games with him.

That’s more likely to annoy him than encourage him.

Instead, encourage him to date you and court you.

Return his calls or text messages quickly.

Don’t frustrate him and leave him hanging when he shows a willingness to be with you.

Don’t keep him guessing whether you’re interested in him.

You don’t have to profess your undying love to him or use the “L” word.

But you should show him you’re interested in him and you’re open to seeing him and spending time with him.

Don’t blow him off when he asks you for a date.

If you can’t make the day or evening that he suggests, suggest another time. Don’t let him get away with a “I’ll phone you another time to set something up” because he might not phone you again.

Let him know you’re disappointed you can’t make the original date and be sure to make firm plans for a new time that is good for both of you.

And don’t cancel on him again – unless it really is a true emergency.

Show your interest in him.

Be fun to be with.

Make him feel excited to be with you so he will want to continue seeing you.

How To Attract Men Table of Contents
Places To Meet Single Men | Internet Dating Scams | Best Online Dating Services

2. Having Sex With Him Too Soon

Let’s face it…it’s no surprise that he wants to sleep with you.

That’s nature’s way.

It doesn’t make him a pervert to have those feelings because it’s a natural thing between two people who are in love.

But having sex too soon can spoil everything.

I know what you’re thinking…

He’s hot.

He’s handsome.

He’s got a gorgeous body.

He has a great smile.

He makes you feel wonderful.

And you’re feeling frisky.

Your hormones are working overtime especially when you’re around him.

You just want to rip his clothes off and get rid of all of that sexual tension that is building up inside of you.

Big mistake!

It’s nature’s (unintentional) trap.

And, if you’re not careful and if you’re not strong, you’re going to fall right into it and perhaps even regret it down the road.

It’s especially difficult if you haven’t been in a relationship for quite a while.

Along comes your perfect man and you want to show him how much you appreciate him and love him.

I get how you’re feeling.

But here’s my suggestion:

If you want the relationship to develop, let it progress naturally.

It’s okay to keep him interested with kissing and touching but that’s the limit until you are ready.

Don’t have sex (including oral sex) until you’re in a committed relationship where you are exclusive to him.

And that means he makes that commitment to you.

You’re not asking him to marry you.

Instead, you’re asking him to commit to being exclusive with you.

That’s the defining point in the relationship to see if it will progress to something more.

You don’t want him sleeping around.

You definitely don’t want to be another notch in his bedpost.

And you don’t want him to satisfy his curiosity about you sexually and then move on to another woman.

You want to be his one and only.

When you give yourself to him you want to feel – and know – that he’s yours and you’re his top priority.

Keep in mind that giving yourself to him doesn’t mean he’ll automatically bond with you or be closer to you and want to be in an exclusive relationship.

Bonding with you is much more likely to happen when he’s in an exclusive relationship with you.

And, it should go without saying that you should be taking normal precautions to prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.

That means testing for STDs and seeing the results, not just taking his word for it.

In fact, it’s wise to discuss these topics before you are intimate with him.

Not only is that being smart about sex it’s also about protecting yourself.

After all, you don’t know where the relationship will go.

Everything looks wonderful now.

But things do change and there’s no guarantee you’ll be together forever.

And you don’t want to be left to raise a beautiful child by yourself or left with an incurable sexual disease.

Both of those things could affect both your future and a future relationship if you were to break up.

Every new relationship takes time to develop and mature.

And some things – especially sex – shouldn’t be rushed. Because the things you do early on in a new relationship can either spoil a good thing or help it to mature into something wonderful and long term.

Avoid making him jump through hoops to date you. And don’t have sex with him until he’s made a commitment to you and you’re in an exclusive relationship.

Blaine Barrington is a Dating and Relationship coach who helps single women find their Mr. Right. He’s the author of the Girl Gets Great Guy System – The System That Cracks The “Guy Code” And Helps You Find The Man Of Your Dreams.

The Girl Gets Great Guy System is for the woman who finds herself in any of the following circumstances:

– Is longing for a loving relationship
– Has had her heart broken too many times
– Intimidates men without meaning to
– Always seems to pick losers and deadbeats
– Wants to have more dates with quality men

Download Blaine’s FREE Special Report, 7 Best Places To Find Mr. Right, his exclusive list of places where great guys hang out. – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank photographer – kirsche222 – for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: Candy hearts photo by kirsche222 on free images

Why You Are Picking The Wrong Guys

“Qualify your guy.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach. why you are picking the wrong guys

Many women find that they are in a committed relationship for years and then they break up.

They wonder what they did wrong when it looked so promising at the beginning of the relationship.

One reason for the eventual breakup is that you might be dating the wrong guy(s) because….

…you’re not qualifying them.

That is the one thing you can do that can save you not only wasted years of being in an unfulfilling relationship but also heartache.

Sometimes you’re overlooking important things that you want from a relationship because you’re attracted to the guy and he makes you happy.

You might have known that you weren’t completely compatible right from the start but ignored it or thought that he’d “change” after he was with you.

That’s a perfectly natural thing to do.

When I talk about “wrong” guys that doesn’t necessarily mean they were “wrong” in the beginning.

Sometimes things change and you have no control over them.

What your guy wanted when he first met you changes over time as the relationship progresses and matures.

Here’s an example:

You meet a great guy. There’s chemistry. There’s romance.

You talk about what you both want from a relationship and you’re both in agreement.

Then, over time, he changes his mind.

Perhaps at first, for example, he wanted children like you did. But as time goes on he decides he doesn’t want children.

But you still do.

In that situation, if you really do want children then you’re no longer compatible.

Do you know what good salespeople do when they talk to a prospect or customer?

They qualify them.

They ask questions to see whether their prospects and customers would be suitable candidates for what they’re selling.

Or they find out what their prospect or customer wants so they can deliver the goods to them.

If you’ve ever bought real estate or you’ve watched shows on TV like Property Brothers you’ll know what I mean.

In Property Brothers, Drew, the real estate expert, finds out what prospective buyers are looking for and then goes out and looks for fixer upper properties that can be upgraded to have many or all of the features the prospective buyers want. Of course, he also knows what the buyers’ budget is so he can scout for suitable properties.

Traditional realtors do the same thing only they usually look for properties that already have most of the features the buyers want.

This technique – qualifying buyers – isn’t just limited to realtors.

Professional salespeople qualify their buyers all the time and a true professional will make it sound conversational instead of peppering his or her prospect or customer with question after question.

How To Attract Men Table of Contents
Places To Meet Single Men | Internet Dating Scams | Best Online Dating Services

Your List of Relationship Non-Negotiables

Qualifying a guy means you should have a list of your non-negotiables.

Non-negotiables are those things you MUST have in a relationship.

They are what I call your “Must Haves.”

Keep that list to no more than 5 of the most important things you want out of a relationship.

Order them in importance if you want to – from most important to least important.

Remember, the longer the list of non-negotiables the harder it will be to find the guy who can satisfy ALL of your requirements.

And don’t be tied down to that list of non-negotiables.

If the man you meet has most of the things that you want in a relationship, you might be perfectly happy with that especially if your must haves are listed in importance.

Your list of non-negotiables can include such things as: a man who wants children, a man who is kind, a man who is romantic, a man who is funny, a man with similar beliefs or values, and a man who is generous.

These non-negotiables are what qualifies a guy as boyfriend material or husband potential.

How To Qualify Your Man

How do you find out if he “qualifies?”

You ask him questions and get his thoughts on things that are important to you.

I’m not suggesting you do this on the first date or two.

But in time you and your man will talk about things that are important to you both.

You might discuss having children.

You might discuss where you want to live.

You might discuss career plans.

You might discuss owning a home.

You might discuss wanting to travel.

You might discuss your dreams and hopes and plans for the future.

Also keep in mind that your relationship should be progressing towards what you want – whether it’s exclusivity or marriage.

If the guy you’re with doesn’t want children (and you do) or he doesn’t want to date exclusively (and you do) or he doesn’t want to get married (and you do) then you’re not compatible and you’re wasting your time with him.

And you have to decide whether you should stay together or break up so that you can each find someone who is more compatible.

Even when you qualify a guy, there’s no certainty that things will work out.

People’s circumstances do change and sometimes it’s beyond their control.

But at least you know there’s a better chance of compatibility and a future together if you know early on in the relationship that you both want the same thing.

Blaine Barrington is a Dating and Relationship coach who helps single women find their Mr. Right. He’s the author of the Girl Gets Great Guy System – The System That Cracks The “Guy Code” And Helps You Find The Man Of Your Dreams.

The Girl Gets Great Guy System is for the woman who has experienced any of the following:

– Is longing for a loving relationship
– Has had her heart broken too many times
– Intimidates men without meaning to
– Always seems to pick losers and deadbeats
– Wants to have more dates with quality men


Download Blaine’s FREE Special Report, 7 Best Places To Find Mr. Right, his exclusive list of places where great guys hang out. – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank Lynn Cummings for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: Have A Heart 2 (c) Lynn Cummings on

Dating Advice For Women: What To Avoid Doing On The First Date

what to avoid doing on the first date

“Sometimes you will do things on a first date that turn a guy off. If you know the things to avoid doing or saying, it increases your chances to get a promising relationship off on the right foot.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach.

One of the main purposes of online and offline dating is to attract men and eventually find the guy who is right for you.

You may have to go on several dates with a number of men until you find a guy you’re interested in or attracted to.

Your first date is very important because it could be the beginning of a long term relationship that eventually leads to marriage.

It defines whether there will be other dates and whether you’ll have the opportunity to get to know the guy you’re with even better.

It’s important that you treat the first date seriously even if it later turns out that nothing comes of it.

The first date in particular can be awkward since you don’t know each other very well.

Even if you met on an online dating site and exchanged emails to get to know each other, there’s still that awkward period where you meet in person and get to know what the other person is like.

Put your best foot forward and dress for the occasion.

Look attractive.

Look sexy without going over the top.

Show respect for the guy you’re meeting by being on time.

Be enthusiastic about meeting him.

Smile and laugh.

Initiate conversation if you need to in order to avoid awkward silences.

If there is a spark or initial chemistry then there’s a excellent chance you’ll have a fun time and enjoy yourself.

But there are ways to sabotage a date without even knowing that you’re doing so.

Here are 6 tips on what to avoid doing on your first date:

1. Avoid Asking Too Many Questions

I realize you want to know everything about the guy as quickly as possible. It helps you decide whether or not he has relationship potential.

But you shouldn’t be approaching the first date as an opportunity to see whether the guy is husband potential. And you shouldn’t make him feel that way, either.

No guy likes to feel as though he’s applying for a job on a date and has to answer question after question.

Some questions, of course, are appropriate and expected.

Questions like: How long have you been single? Why did you break up? Have you been married before? How long was your last relationship?

Questions to avoid are those about his health or his finances. You’re not his doctor nor his banker. Answers to these types of questions always seem to emerge relatively quickly once you get talking to someone. So have patience and look for clues that he’s not healthy or his financial situation is disastrous – or better still that he’s strong as an ox and he’s financially sound.

Use the date to get to know him to see if there are common interests and whether he is worth getting to know better.

2. Avoid Arriving For Your Date Late

First impressions count – even in dating. Showing up late for your date can spoil an otherwise fun time especially if something specific has been planned – like an outing or a reservation has been made.

If you’re chronically late, plan to arrive early so you can ground yourself before meeting your new guy

3. Avoid Monopolizing The Conversation

Usually when getting to know a guy you want to share information back and forth.

There’s a give and take as you exchange information about each other.

You’ll want to know about his work, his hobbies, where he grew up, his education, and his family. Many or all of these things might have been covered if you met on an online dating site. (It’s usually best to keep some information in reserve so you have something to talk about when you meet.)

Don’t talk about yourself all the time. And don’t monopolize the conversation.

If you’ve got children or grandchildren don’t start pulling out their photos and gushing over them. He wants to get to know about you first.

Be sure to find out about him and then contribute your background so he knows more about you.

4. Avoid Talking About Past Relationships

Past relationships is one of the most common questions asked on a first date.

There is no bigger turnoff than talking about past failed relationships or the faults of your last ex-boyfriend or ex-husband.

Guys usually want to know the reason you’re divorced or why you broke up with your boyfriend but you don’t have to go into specific detail.

You don’t want to give the impression that you’re not in demand or that you were so wounded by your last relationship that you’d (almost) given up hope of finding someone.

A general response that things didn’t work out or that you grew apart is sufficient and much better than talking about the lying, cheating so-and-so that he was.

You don’t want to make it sound as though – or give the impression that – you’re bitter or that you hate men or that you’re emotionally cold towards men in particular after your last relationship experience.

5. Avoid Excessive Drinking

A woman who is drunk or tipsy is a turnoff to men. Not only that, it can be dangerous to her safety.

Know your limit (Patti Stanger of Millionaire Matchmaker suggests a two drink maximum, but even that might be too much for you) and keep a clear head.

Keep in mind that you don’t know this guy.

You don’t know if you can trust him and you don’t know how safe you are with him.

6. Avoid Professing Your Love Or Affection For Him

It seems strange to suggest this since it’s only a first date.

But if you’ve met each other online through an online dating service, chances are you’ve formed some “feelings” for him even before you meet him.

If he measures up to your idea of what he is like in real life, there’s a tendency to tell him how you feel about him.

To do so is a mistake.  It makes you sound needy which can turn a guy off.

Instead, play it cool.

The first date is a chance to get to know each other and to see if there is chemistry and potential compatibility.

So take it slowly. Be fun. Be playful. Be flirtatious. And have a good time.

If the first date is a success then there will be many more opportunities down the road to get closer to your guy and tell him how you feel about him.

How To Attract Men And Find Your Mr. Right

Finding the RIGHT guy isn’t easy.

And when you DO find him, you don’t want to spoil things and lose him.

But how do you determine whether he’s the guy of your dreams or a loser?

And how do you know how to keep him once you’ve been successful in catching him?

If you’re tired of being single and you’re ready to love one great guy then be sure to take a few minutes to check out the Girl Gets Great Guy System.

The Girl Gets Great Guy System shows you step-by-step how to find the guy who is right for you and how to keep him.

Click the following link for more information about the Girl Gets Great Guy System and how it can help you find the guy of your dreams.

Download Blaine’s FREE Special Report, 7 Best Places To Find Mr. Right, his exclusive list of BEST places where great guys hang out.

How To Make Your Man Adore You

Home Dating Advice For Women
“When your man adores you he stays faithful to you and has eyes only for you. These are just a few of the many techniques you can use to make your man adore you.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach how to make your man adore you

Once you’ve found a good man, it’s important to know how to melt his heart and make your man – whether he’s your boyfriend or your husband – appreciate you, love you, desire you, become “addicted” to you, and adore only you.

Being in love and having great chemistry and sizzling, hot sex aren’t the only ingredients that keep a relationship together and enduring.

There are other things that round out a relationship to create a unique bond and keep it strong year after year.

If you can master the following techniques – as well as other techniques I reveal in How To Inspire Your Man To Love, Cherish, Appreciate and Adore You – you have a much better chance of keeping your man happy, satisfied, and in love with you.

Your man wants someone who “gets” him – someone who knows him like no other person does.

If you “get” him and he knows it and feels it to his very core, you will form a close,unbreakable bond with him.

When your man adores you, he will feel closer to you and he will try to do things that make you happy.

Because ultimately, a man wants to make his wife or girlfriend happy. Men are “wired” that way. And he’ll go to great lengths to make a woman happy if he feels appreciated, respected, admired, and loved.

If you don’t believe me, think about what a man says when he gets involved with another woman. He says, “My wife (or girlfriend) doesn’t understand me.” And the “other woman” does. She does the things your man seeks from his relationship – the things that, if you can give them to him, will keep him happy and faithful to you.

1. Keep The Attraction Alive By Being Feminine

He was originally attracted to you because of your femininity…and probably your sexiness. After all, attraction is what makes him interested in you in the first place. Attraction is the reason he wants to get to know you better.

Even if you know how to drive a big rig or fix a car engine or swing a hammer on a construction site, he still looks for and desires your feminine and sexy side.

Show him your feminine side – whether it’s by wearing a sexy little black cocktail dress and high heels, or leather pants and high boots, or sexy lingerie.

Flirt with him. Be playful. Be sexy.

Keep the attraction alive by taking care of yourself, making sure you look attractive and smell wonderful, and wearing clothing and lingerie that accent your best features.

Maintain your grooming to a high standard. Looking comfy is one thing, looking frumpy is another thing entirely.

Eat healthy foods. Exercise. Watch your weight. Glow. Smile. Laugh. Be positive. Be affectionate.

Make him proud to have you on his arm.

Attraction isn’t all about sex and chemistry. Nor is it all about physical attraction.

There are many more elements that go into being attractive to a man and inspiring him to appreciate you and be the only woman he wants in his life.

Here are some more suggestions on what makes a man adore a woman…

2. Make Suggestions Sparingly

From time to time your man might ask you for your suggestions.

This is where you have to tread very carefully and lightly.

Because while he might want – and need – your suggestions, he might also resent or take offense when you give him suggestions (even when he has asked for your help!)

It makes no sense really, until you realize that most guys like to think they have all the answers and they know everything.

So when they ask someone for help it makes them feel inferior and feel like a failure.

For example, if your man has built his business from the ground up and he asks for your help he might feel that he has let you down and that your suggestions are a way of criticizing him.

When he asks for suggestions, tread softly. Don’t overdo it, even though you mean well. And even if he insists he wants or values your suggestions.

Above all else, don’t get caught up in the notion that you’re giving “constructive criticism.”

Criticism in any form is destructive. It can be hurtful. It can be demoralizing. It can break someone’s spirit and enthusiasm.

Instead of saying, “You’ve been doing that wrong. Do it this way” try something like…“Have you considered trying it this way to see if that gives you better results?” or “If it were me, I’d try this way.”

Of course, in any relationship or marriage it doesn’t have to be something you do or don’t do. Instead, there can be something missing.

It might be the romance. It might be the passion. It might be the lust. Or it might be something else.

Whatever it is, sometimes you just need a little guidance and new ideas to put the sizzle back and heighten the romance and passion and excitement.

After all, you came here looking for answers because there’s something that’s not right in your relationship.


> You’re wondering if your man still loves you or even cares about you

> You’re feeling alone in your relationship

> You feel you’re the only one who does anything in the relationship and he’s not pulling his weight

> The romance and passion have disappeared from your relationship

> You love your man but he’s clueless about you and your wants, needs, and desires

and you want him to love you again or show more love towards you…

…then click the following link for How To Inspire Your Man To Love, Cherish, Appreciate and Adore You and discover how to capture and recapture your man’s heart!

After all, wouldn’t it be wonderful if there were more romance and passion, more love and caring, more touching and affection, more harmony and peace in your relationship so you feel loved and special all over again, just like it was when you and your man first met and started dating?

3.  Understand His Needs  

If you haven’t guessed it by now, your man has needs.

Some of those needs will be different from those you have.

Others will be the same.

Many of those needs will come as no surprise to you.

He needs sex and intimacy.

He needs to be loved, appreciated, and adored by you.

He needs your respect.

He needs your support so that he knows you have his back.

He needs someone who understands him.

He needs time alone in his Man Den.

He needs time to do his own thing – whether they’re hobbies or sports.

He needs time to hang out with his buddies.

His needs are very important to him.

If his needs are fulfilled he will feel satisfied and not seek them elsewhere.

4.  Treat Him Right

Treat him as though he is the most intelligent, loving, funny, loyal, and attractive man in the world.

After all, there are things about him that you admire, respect, and like about him, otherwise you would never have fallen in love with him in the first place.

Make him feel desired and wanted…the way you would want to be treated.

5. Don’t Judge Him, Stand By Him

Avoid being like a critical parent.

He doesn’t want someone to tell him when he’s done something wrong – that just makes him feel like a little boy who’s been naughty or bad.

He’s looking for a partner, someone who is by his side and who supports him.

Sometimes that can be difficult – especially if he makes silly (or even stupid) decisions.

Ultimately, though, a man wants his girlfriend or wife to be his biggest fan. He wants someone who can cheer him on and who will stick by him through thick and thin.

6. Don’t Disrespect Him

A man doesn’t want to feel disrespected.

In fact, being respected by the woman he loves is very important to him.

Respect his right to have beliefs and values that are different from yours rather than ridiculing them or scoffing at them.

Avoid looking for ways to capitalize on opportunities to belittle or humiliate or embarrass him and that make him feel small and unappreciated.

7. Make Him Feel Loved, Valued, And Appreciated

When he’s least expecting it*, go up to him or go up behind him, wrap your arms around him, give him a big hug, kiss him and tell him how much you love him and value him and appreciate him in your life.

He’ll be thrilled to hear your words of love!

(*A word of caution: This technique can be very distracting. Don’t do this when he’s concentrating on something like a computer program or game or working intently on something like a project or using power tools or fixing the car.)

There are many more techniques you can use to make your man adore you.

Keep in mind, though, that these tips are just the beginning.

By using these – and many more – techniques you’ll go a long way in keeping your man happy and true to you.

A savvy woman knows how to treat her man so he has eyes only for her.

She knows the secrets that make her man happy that she’s in his life.

She doesn’t have just one or two secrets, though.

She knows dozens and dozens of ways to love, appreciate, and excite her man and make him feel like he’s the luckiest guy in the world.

Best of all, she uses these secrets all the time in subtle ways that work like magic on her man.

If your boyfriend or husband is…

> cold

> distant

> unloving

> or has shut down and created an emotional wall

and you want him to love you again or you want him to be more loving…

…then click the following link for How To Inspire Your Man To Love, Cherish, Appreciate and Adore You and discover how to capture and recapture your man’s heart!

You’ll find 101 ways – the secrets savvy women know – to add more love, respect, passion, and excitement to your relationship. Plus, you’ll find ways to ignite the passion in your relationship so he desires you, wants you, and can’t live without you. (Who doesn’t want that in their relationship?) – the site that gives relationship and dating advice to women and helps them find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank Andrew C. for the beautiful roses photo in this article. Image credit: Roses (c) Andreyutzu #936341

How To Attract A Man

“Sometimes the problem isn’t about being able to attract a man. It’s about being approachable so the RIGHT man can get to know you.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coachhow to attract a man

Knowing how to attract a man is a common problem many women have.

Surprisingly, attracting men isn’t really that hard to do.

Often the problem is not about knowing how to attract men.

It’s knowing how to attract a man who is right for you.

It’s knowing how to attract a great guy who you’d like to have a relationship with…and perhaps even marry down the road if things work out.

First, examine why you find it hard to attract a man because it might be something that you’re doing and you don’t even realize it.

Are You Finding It Difficult To Attract A Man?

When you say you can’t attract men you might mean that men don’t approach you.

If that’s the case then you need to think about WHY men don’t approach you.

It could be that you’re so attractive that men automatically think you’re unavailable.

As well, you should also consider whether you’re approachable.

If you hang out with a lot of guys or friends, then a guy who is interested in you won’t approach you because he’s intimidated. He wants to approach you when you’re alone, not when you’re with a friend or a group of friends.

Do you find that men don’t speak to you in a way that signals that they are interested in you?

If that’s the case, then you might be Friend Zoned – and that can be a difficult situation to break out of.

Usually, being Friend Zoned occurs when guys see you as one of them – not as an attractive woman…even though you are.

It might be the way you dress. It might be the way you speak. It might be the things you do that are masculine instead of feminine.

You might ride dirt bikes with the best of them.

You might fix cars and drive hot rods.

You might drive a 4×4 truck and go muddin’ in the back roads.

You might like going hunting and fishing with the guys.

If you’re doing things just like one of the boys, then guys usually won’t see you as a romantic interest but rather as a buddy.

It doesn’t mean you stop doing the things you love or stop hanging out with the guys.

It just means you have to be feminine and show to the guys you hang out with that you’re an attractive woman.

And finally, do you find you don’t know what to say when you meet a guy who you’re interested in?

Being tongue tied isn’t all that unusual – especially when you see an attractive man. If you’re tongue tied it hinders your ability to approach the guy and start a conversation – and that can lead to missed opportunities.

How To Attract Men Table of Contents
What To Avoid Doing On The First Date | Internet Dating Scams | Best Online Dating Services


Turnoffs That Don’t Attract A Man

While it’s always good to know how to attract a man, you should also know some things that repel a man.

These are things he finds unattractive in a woman.

For example….

1. A woman who is needy or desperate is a huge turnoff to a man.

This is the woman who is too eager. She has no mystery. Everything is an open book – which is not necessarily a bad thing but it’s as though she wants an instant romance or love affair so she can be in a relationship.

This is the type of woman who needs a man in her life – either because she’s at that age where she wants to be married and have children or she’s insecure and needs a male presence in her life.

A guy might not know it from looking at her but once he’s talked to her for a while he’ll sense her desperation for wanting to have a man in her life.

(The secret? The needy woman has to be more independent but still be feminine.)

2. A woman who is too independent repels men.

This is the very opposite of a needy woman.

This can sometimes be the woman who says, “I’m attractive and I have a nice personality. And yet, men don’t approach me or ask me out on dates.”

The independent woman shows her masculine side.

She wears “masculine” clothes (like business suits or pant suits) or works in an industry or has a career that pits her against men all the time.

She’s proud of the fact that she can take care of herself and hold her own against men.

And there’s nothing wrong with that at all.

Trouble is, men want a woman who is feminine.

A woman who shows her feminine side.

A woman who dresses up in a sexy dress and high heels.

A woman who takes care of her hair and makeup.

That’s what attracts a man to a woman and what turns him on.

Not only that, men want to feel useful.

They want to feel that they can take care of a woman and please her.

The independent woman doesn’t show her femininity nor does she allow men to help her which is a BIG mistake.

(The secret? The independent woman has to switch off her “masculine” side and switch on her “feminine” side.)

3. Being a drama queen is unattractive to men.

Guys really don’t like drama at all.

They prefer a woman who is cool under pressure and remains positive and fun to be with.

The woman who complains about the smallest things or creates a scene or makes a fuss will find herself very quickly without a man.

(The secret? The drama queen has to chill out, remain cool, and not let things bother her.)

For the top 5 turnoffs for men you’re invited to download my FREE Dating Mistakes Special Report here.

Three Things You Can Do If You Want To Attract A Man


 1. Make Yourself Approachable

Men look for signs before approaching a woman.

If she’s at a club with her friends most men are intimidated to approach a woman who they are attracted to.

If a woman is sitting alone a man is more likely to approach her.

But just being approachable isn’t always enough.

You might have to encourage a guy to approach you.

If you see someone you like or you’re interested in, look at him and smile at him.

This is a signal to him that you’re interested in him. (And hopefully he’ll take the hint and introduce himself.)

 2. Build Your Confidence

Have you ever seen a confident woman around men? She talks. She flirts. She laughs. She has men hanging practically on her every word.

What makes this type of woman so confident around men is that she knows what to do and say.

And it’s that confidence that’s attractive to men – and attracts men to her.

Of course, some women are naturals when it comes to being confident. They know what to do to attract men.

They’ve learned their flirting skills.

They know what works and what doesn’t work.

If you feel unsure about your flirting skills then you have to develop them.

That involves learning how to approach men instead of waiting for them to approach you.

That means you also have to develop conversational skills.

 3. Build Your Conversational Skills

Have you ever noticed that when you see a cute or attractive guy, you get tongue tied and you can’t think of a thing to talk about?

For many women, that’s perfectly normal.

The quickest and easiest way to overcome being tongue tied is to talk to men all the time – whether or not you’re attracted to them.

Talk to them in grocery stores, in lineups, at the bank, at the coffee shop. Make small talk just to get things started.

Talk about the weather. Talk about the items on the menu. Talk about something that strikes you as funny.

This gets you into the habit of being approachable and interesting because you’ve taken the initiative to start a conversation.

Then, when you do see an attractive guy you’re interested in you’ll be able to start a conversation quickly and easily and see where it goes from there.

In the Girl Gets Great Guy System, I talk about how to be approachable in greater depth because it’s one of the most important skills to have when you’re trying to attract the right man for you.

Blaine Barrington is a Dating and Relationship coach who helps single women find their Mr. Right. He’s the author of the Girl Gets Great Guy System – The System That Cracks The “Guy Code” And Helps You Find The Man Of Your Dreams.

The Girl Gets Great Guy System is for the woman who wants to find her one true love.

It’s for the woman who:

– Is longing for a loving relationship
– Never seems to be able to keep a good man for long
– Always seems to pick losers and deadbeats
– Wants to have more dates with quality men

Click the following link to find out more about the Girl Gets Great Guy System

How To Get The Guy – the site that gives relationship and dating advice to women and helps them find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank Marcelo Silva for the beautiful photo in this article. Image credit: Sunset Graceosa Beach (c) Marcelo Silva #1384968


Places To Meet Single Men

“Be proactive. Get out there and meet men. It doesn’t matter whether you’re a spectator or participator. The important thing is to meet guys. You just have to make sure they’re quality guys. Meeting quality men is one of the most effective ways to find your Mr. Right.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coachplaces to meet single men

Many women approach dating and relationships with a single goal – to find a good man as soon as possible. And that’s perfectly understandable.

After all, being involved in a relationship with a guy is what you want when you make the decision to look for a good man.

But it can put guys off if you come on too strong. They sense something isn’t quite right. They might even think you’re desperate. So you have to be more subtle in the way you approach it.

Instead of approaching having a relationship as your goal, I’d suggest changing your focus to this…

Meeting a guy is all about getting to know him as a friend.

So you approach guys as someone you’d like to get to know as a friend…at least at first.

(But, for goodness sake, don’t say to a guy – especially with online dating – that you want to be friends first. It’s a huge turnoff for guys.)

This doesn’t mean you put him in the Friend Zone.

It means you start out by thinking of him as a friend and getting to know him.

Because, ultimately, if you do get into a relationship, the friendship you have is just as important as the sex.

Probably more so because the sex can diminish over time but a true friendship will last and endure through good and bad times.

This casual approach can lead to dating and, if it’s the right guy, a relationship…and even marriage.

Keep in mind that the men you meet might not be what you’re looking for. But some of those men might introduce you to The One because they may be friends with The One or related to him.

I realize that you lead a busy life with work and family and life and that online dating has its advantages – it’s convenient, you don’t have to dress up, and you can stay anonymous.

But there’s nothing like getting out and meeting guys and seeing them in their element. You’ll see them do things they are passionate about.

You’ll have an opportunity to talk to them and ask them questions and get to know them.

Not all of these places that I suggest will be available to you. And you don’t have to be involved in every one of the activities either.

The point is to be aware of the possibilities available and I want to motivate you to take action to meet great guys. The more guys you meet the better your chances of meeting the man you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Many of these events you’ll have to attend by yourself. With some of them you might want to take a wing woman with you, but it’s more difficult for guys to approach you if you’re with someone else.

And keep this in mind: Those activities or classes that involve instruction are some of the best places to get to know guys because guys love to show how much they know about a certain topic.

Here is a short list of places to meet single men:

1. Luxury car dealership parties – Talk to guys who go to these events even if they’re married. Married men have sons or friends who might be single and available.

2. Join or watch a co-ed softball, volleyball, or bowling league

3. Take a kayaking, (motor) boating, or sailing class

4. Realtor parties – These aren’t open houses. These are parties where realtors press the flesh and pitch prospective buyers. Talk to guys who go to these even if they’re married

5. Take a hunting, archery, or an automotive repair class. You might not know a thing about these topics but you’ll find guys willing to share their knowledge.

6. Golf – Take lessons, visit golf stores, attend golf tournaments and chat with guys whether single or not (the married ones might have a cute son or they might have single friends)

7. Home improvement stores – Home Depot and Lowes are two of the biggest stores for home improvements. Walk around the aisles especially the tools, plumbing, and lumber sections of the stores. Tradesmen are usually at these stores early in the morning. Do-it-yourselfers usually shop on the weekends.

8. Sporting goods stores – REI, L.L. Bean, and Mountain Equipment Co-op are a few of the big names in sporting goods in the U.S. and Canada. But there are many more specialty stores as well. Hang out where men are likely to be, especially the fishing, hunting, baseball, cycling, and camping sections

9. Investment, real estate, and business seminars – Sit next to or strike up a conversation with (single) guys

10. Attend local sporting events – especially baseball, soccer, hockey, and basketball

11. Go to the dog park – If you don’t have a dog, volunteer to take a friend’s dog to the park (or go with your friend) so you can meet (male) dog lovers

12. Visit computer and electronic stores or join a computer club and ask guys for their suggestions and recommendations about computers, hard drives, thumb drives, laptops, notebooks, cell phones, TVs, stereos, and other electronic equipment. This is geek and nerd territory but you’ll find nice guys who will be happy to help you.

13. Join a wine tasting club or attend an open house if they have one. Remember: This is to meet guys, not get drunk or get a DUI. So be sure to keep your drinking to a minimum. If in doubt, get a taxi or have a friend drive you home.

14. Join a political group or be a volunteer – You’ll meet enthusiastic men who share similar political views that you do

15. Attend Chamber of Commerce or business networking events and network with business owners. Attend their silent auctions and get involved in projects or be on committees.

16. Volunteer in your community to meet men who want to serve their community or contribute money to worthy causes. These can include charitable organizations, fund raisers for national campaigns, or local charities.

17. Join a skiing or snowboarding club. Dress the part in an attention-getting outfit.

18. Join a backpacking, travel, or camping group or club. This is a great opportunity to ask questions about equipment and places to travel to.

This list is just the beginning…

In the Girl Gets Great Guy System I show you many more places where you can find quality men who are looking for a wonderful woman like you. – the site that gives dating advice for women and shows women how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank John Nyberg for the image in this article. Image credit: Couple kissing in sunset (c) by Johnny Nyberg. Photo by johnnyberg on

Signs Of Falling In Love With A Guy

26801107_s“Falling in love and being in love are two of the most wonderful feelings that can happen to a person.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach

You meet a new guy and you start dating him.

You try and keep it light and casual and upbeat but something starts changing with the way you feel about him.

It might be that you’re starting to fall for him.

In fact, you might even be smitten with him.

And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. It’s such a wonderful feeling when you’re in love.

Here are 7 signs you’re falling in love with him…

1. You Can’t Stop Thinking About Him And About Having A Future Together

Virtually every new relationship has a certain excitement about it.

Things are new and fresh and interesting.

You think about him constantly.

You smile at the very thought of him.

You day dream about him.

And you wonder what it would be like to have him in your life every day – to wake up beside him and to look at him over breakfast or dinner.

2. You Miss Him And Feel Lonely When You’re Not With Him

You get used to having him in your life and you enjoy his company.

And you get used to talking to him and having fun with him.

You like sitting beside him and watching TV together…or going to the park with him…or pottering around the garden together.

You like his hugs and kisses and words of endearment.

You like holding hands with him.

You like the way he teases you and compliments you.

You like his jokes and you like laughing with him.

When you’re not with him – or he’s not with you – you feel lonely.

You want him around all the time – or at the very least you want to see him as much as possible to the exclusion of other things – so you can talk to him and do things with him and see his smile.

3. You Start Dating Him Exclusively

Other guys you’ve been dating pale in comparison to him. He just seems so manly and romantic and he makes you happy.

You want to focus all of your time on him and you plan to spend all of your free time with him.

This is a big step because it might even mean you are both exclusive at this point. Or it might mean you’re committed to him but he hasn’t made that commitment to you yet.

4. Your Life Seems Happier Since You’ve Met Him And Started Dating Him

Sometimes life seems to be full of hassles and you feel so stressed out.

But now…things don’t upset you as much as they used to because you’re “in love.”

Your outlook on life is happier and things just seem better now that you’ve met this great guy.

5. You Ignore Or Overlook His Faults

Admittedly you’re biased here because you’re into him and you’re attracted to him.

Even his quirks and the unusual things he does have a certain charm to them that endear him to you.

In fact, his faults might seem kind of cute to you at this point in the relationship.

6. You Want To Be Intimate With Him

This can be a huge step for you.

You’re attracted to him, there’s that “spark,” and you want him.

But you have to be careful even if your desire for him is strong – you don’t give yourself to him just because he’s hot and there’s crackling chemistry between the two of you.

If he hasn’t made a commitment to you to date exclusively then this is one area where you hold back until he’s ready to make that commitment.

This isn’t about teasing him or frustrating him – it’s about being smart in catching a man and keeping him.

If you’re intimate with him too early in the relationship you risk losing him. That’s because his curiosity will be satisfied and he might move on to another woman.

7. You Start Changing Or Making Changes To Please Him

You might change the color of your hair or the length of your hair because he likes it a certain way and you want to please him.

You might dress a certain way to please him. You might wear certain lingerie that he’s particularly fond of seeing you wear.

You might start reading books or listening to music or watching movies that he likes or has mentioned or recommended to you.

You make him your priority rather than going to the gym or hanging out with your friends.

Any of these signs can mean you’re falling for a guy and that you’re in love with him.

The challenge though is to carry on with your life rather than making your new guy your whole life.

Falling in love is a wonderful feeling. But don’t overlook the signs that he has boyfriend potential instead of being just a short term distraction.

Blaine Barrington is a Dating and Relationship coach who helps single women find their Mr. Right. He’s the author of the Girl Gets Great Guy System – The System That Cracks The “Guy Code” And Helps You Find The Man Of Your Dreams.

Download Blaine’s FREE Special Report, 7 Best Places To Find Mr. Right, his exclusive list of places where great guys hang out.

Signs He’s Boyfriend Material

“Look for these signs he’s a great guy with boyfriend potential.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coachhearts

What you’ve invariably learned about love is that a relationship that initially looks promising doesn’t mean it will last. Sometimes the chemistry isn’t as strong as you thought. Other times you discover you’re not as compatible as you thought.

Just look at the Bachelorette TV Show as an example.

It’s so easy to fall in love with a handsome, funny, charismatic man.

The locations and settings are romantic.

There are candle-lit dinners.

There’s attraction.

There’s instant chemistry.

There’s passion.

There are fireworks.

There are private and public appearances with musicians, bands, and celebrities.

There are fun things to do either as a group or on a one-on-one date.

There’s the fantasy suite where the Bachelorette and her final choices “get to know each other” better.

It’s like you’re in a relationship bubble of romance and passion.

It’s so easy to fall in love when you feel the strong attraction and the chemistry.

The heart rules.

The reality, though can be totally different.

There’s the TV relationship that suddenly turns from seeing each other often to being in a long distance relationship because the Bachelorette and the “winner” live in different cities.

There can be the family dynamics where the parents and siblings are skeptical and don’t fully accept the Bachelorette’s new boyfriend.

There can be career situations where one has to give up their job or career to be with the other if they decide to live together.

The distance and time apart becomes a problem and decisions have to be made about who has to move so they can be together.

Invariably time will tell whether there’s a true connection and true compatibility and whether this is a lasting relationship or one that fizzles out.

As you know, when it comes to love and relationships there are no guarantees.

But there are clues that increase your chances of finding a great guy…and knowing you have found a great guy.

It’s not that difficult to decide if a guy has boyfriend potential. Because if you’re feeling the chemistry and you like him and he’s nice then chances are he’s a great guy to have as a boyfriend.

Sometimes when you’re falling in love or you’re initially smitten with a guy, you need to take a step back to look at things objectively. If you feel deep down that something is not quite right then listen to your instincts because chances are something isn’t right.

You’ll generally have two situations with relationships:

1. You’re just getting to know a guy but you haven’t moved beyond that to be considered boyfriend and girlfriend in an exclusive relationship

2. You’re beyond the beginning stages of getting to know each other and you’re moving into or you’re already in an exclusive or monogamous relationship. By this time you should be boyfriend and girlfriend although there will be situations where it’s not as well defined even though you spend time together.

If you have any doubts that the guy you’re interested in is boyfriend material, then here are some signs a guy could make a good boyfriend (think of this a your “boyfriend material checklist” or “good guy checklist”).

1. He’s Not A Player And He Wants A Relationship

Players usually have a reputation for being a “player.” They could even be pickup artists.

They’re usually easy to spot once you get to know them a little bit.

They frequent clubs and bars for the night life and the action.

So if you’re into that scene as well, then chances are you’re going to run into a player.

They’re smooth. They have good pickup lines. They know what to say to “woo” women.

However, players usually have short(er) term relationships. They might play the field. They might be into one-night stands.

They might even have a large number of women who are their friends.

Players usually grow weary of their existing relationship and look for someone “better.” So their investment in the relationship might not be as much as yours because they know it will eventually end and they will move on.

A guy with boyfriend potential is a good guy. A nice guy. In a way, that might even seem boring.

But he’s definitely not a rebel or a bad boy.

He doesn’t play games and he wants to be in a relationship.

He doesn’t want to play the field and you’re not another notch in his bedpost.

2. You Can Rely On Him And Trust What He Says

His word is his bond. You can rely on what he says.

He’s not the type who says one thing and does the exact opposite.

If he says he’ll do something you can trust that he’ll keep his word.

3. He Makes You Feel Happy When You’re With Him

He has a calming influence on you. It’s exciting to be with him because he’s a fun guy and he makes you feel good about yourself.

He makes you feel safe and desired.

Best of all, there are no pretenses – you can be yourself around him and he’s himself around you.

4. Your Friends And Family Like Him

The rebel doesn’t care what others think about him. And that can cause unnecessary friction with those who are closest to you.

There’s nothing more stressful and upsetting than knowing your friends and family don’t like your boyfriend.

Sometimes they’re wrong. But chances are they see something about him that you don’t – and it’s not a good sign.

A great boyfriend will treat your friends and family well and get to know them.

You know you’ve got a keeper when your friends and family aren’t telling you to ditch him because he’s no good for you or you deserve better.

Better still if your girlfriends ask you to tell them if you and your guy ever break up because they think he’s hot.

5. He Knows What’s Important To You

He listens to you and knows what you like and don’t like.

He knows what’s important to you and he respects that. He doesn’t put you down, criticize you, or make you feel stupid or inadequate because you have certain beliefs or morals or tastes.

6. He Thinks You’re Hot Even When You’re Not Feeling (or Looking) Hot

Chances are you have those days when you feel fat or you just don’t feel pretty.

But a great guy makes you feel pretty by the way he treats you and the things he says to you.  That’s the type of guy you want to have around.

He makes you feel good about yourself.

To him, you’re hot, no matter how you feel about yourself. And that’s a good thing.

7. He’s Your Friend

He’s the type of guy you can confide in.

He’s the type of guy you can talk to about (almost) anything.

He’s there for you when things get tough.

He’s there to encourage you and cheer you on.

He’s there to listen to you and give you advice if you ask for it.

8. He Cares

He cares about you.

He cares how you feel.

He cares about your feelings.

He cares about what’s important to you.

He’s there to support you.

He has your back.

And while all these little factors might at first not seem very important, how he feels about you (now and as time goes on) is a major factor in determining whether he’ll make a great boyfriend.

You might not find all of these qualities in the guy you’re interested in. But the more qualities you do find, the better the chances are that he IS boyfriend material and he is someone you should seriously consider to have in your life.

Is He Boyfriend Material That Can Lead To
Being Your Husband?

The next step, after dating for a while, and getting to know each other better, is to decide whether he’s a keeper – the man you might want to eventually marry.

Because in the early stages of dating everything is fresh and new.

It’s exciting.

It’s thrilling.

It’s exhilarating.

It’s about dreaming of a future with someone you fall in love with.

As times goes on though, you’ll discover things about him that you like and don’t like.

Things that were “cute” at first could become irritants later on.

Or they could just be things that you accept because your love for him grows deeper and deeper.

Most importantly, though, you’ll discover whether you’re compatible or not.

Compatibility is one of the keys to a lasting relationship.

It determines whether you can get along with each other, whether you enjoy being with each other, and whether you grow together as a couple.

In many cases, these early stages of a relationship can be the most challenging.

You see he has “boyfriend potential” but you get caught up in the attraction and the lust and passion.

That’s what Mother Nature intended to happen.

Are You And Your Boyfriend Compatible?

Of course, there’s another side to relationships.

It’s about getting to know each other and understanding who that person is at the very core of their being.

Ultimately, you have to determine whether he’s the person you want in your life.

You’ll be asking yourself questions (and looking for answers to questions) like…

Is he a nice person?

Is he kind?

Does he fly off the handle, get moody and start arguments, or show road rage?

Does he show empathy and gentleness to you and others?

Does he help others or is he selfish?

Would he be a good husband who would keep you safe and look after you?

Would he be a good father and raise children you’d be proud of?

In the initial stages of getting to know each other, things always seem so positive.

He’s your dream guy.

He can do no wrong.

But that’s because you don’t really know him very well.

What issues does he bring to the relationship from his past?

How was he raised?

How has he been treated by women in past relationships?

Why did his past relationships fail?

What lessons has he learned from his past relationships?

Is he looking for a partner or arm candy?

Will he be a fantastic provider but be so busy with his career that you always come second and feel lonely and unloved in your relationship (or marriage)?

Knowing how your man reacts in different situations is also important.

Does he pull away and withdraw?

Does he go cold and distant?

Does he push you away when you want to be amorous?

Is he controlling?

Does he do things that hurt or disturb you?

These are the questions that can only be answered with time as you interact with him and get to know him.

How To Make Your Boyfriend Adore You

If you’ve found a man you want as your boyfriend or you want to spend the rest of your life with, then you have to know how to KEEP him.

You have to be the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with.

Truth is, you’re in competition with other women who are vying for his attention and affection – even when he is in a committed relationship.

If he loses interest in you it might be because he’s more interested in other women.

But a man who loves, cherishes, appreciates and adores you has eyes only for you.

It’s not enough to be sexy.

It’s not enough to be a tigress in bed and be able to turn him on and inflame his desire.

Men not only think differently than women, they have a “checklist” of what is important to them when they select a life partner.

If you’ve ever wondered why a man breaks up with the woman he’s been dating for a long time and then marries someone else (usually shortly after), it’s because the “other woman” did something that made him choose her over all other women.

In fact, it’s very likely the woman he married knew the secrets to understanding her man so that he adored her.

If you want to increase your chances that your boyfriend will love you and adore you, then find out how to inspire him to love, cherish, appreciate and adore you here.

How To Make Your Man Adore You – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank Stephen Gibson for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: Beautiful valentine chocolate hearts image #1254000 at

How To Respond If A Guy Phones You A Week Or Two After A Great First Date

Home Dating Advice For Women
how to inspire your man to adore you“Your attitude can make or break a promising relationship. In this dating advice for women article I explain your choices if a man doesn’t phone you shortly after going on a great date with you.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach.

What Every Woman Should Know About A Guy Who Doesn’t Phone After A Great Date

There are several reasons why a man doesn’t phone you after having a great first or second date with you.

If he does call a week or more after a great date then how you respond to him will determine whether there is potential for a relationship or not.

I’m going to give you ideas on how to react so you don’t blow your chances of missing out on a great guy.

When you meet a great guy and you’ve had a great first (or second) date you get your hopes up.

He seems to have many of the qualities you’re looking for in a guy. He’s attractive. He’s funny and personable. He’s interesting.

You think there’s a chance of a relationship and he might even be The One.

You’re willing to make him a priority and put most of your other activities on hold to get to know him better to see if things will develop.

Trouble is, you don’t know what he’s thinking. He may still be processing the date and trying to decide whether he wants to pursue things with you.

He might want to pursue things with you but his job (or other activity) takes precedence and time gets away from him.

And even if you think he could have picked up the phone or texted you or emailed you, some guys just don’t think that way. They put things off and before you know it a week or more has gone by.

You have to remember that with the first few dates – and until you’re in an exclusive relationship with him – you are NOT his number one priority unless he has virtually no life to speak of…or unless he is totally head-over-heels in love with you and completely infatuated with you (in which case he’d be contacting you a lot).

The first few weeks and even months are the “getting to know you” stage. Things are casual. And until things become more serious, you should assume he’s dating other women.

In the meantime, he has work. He has his friends. He has his activities and hobbies. He might even have a pet like a dog that comes before you (I’m sorry to say that, but that’s reality, because to some guys their dog is their best buddy and gets tons of attention.)

So you have to accept that you’re not a priority in his life (at least not right now) – you’re still someone he’s getting to know.

Admittedly, if he contacts you a week or two after a date, he’s either not showing much interest or he’s not very considerate or he’s inexperienced in dating.

But it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s not attracted to you and doesn’t want to get to know you better.

Why He May Not Have Contacted You

It can be really confusing and frustrating can’t it? You go on a great date with a guy. You think there’s potential for something more and then you don’t hear from him. Or he promises to phone and then you don’t hear from him.

And a week or so later he resurfaces. It’s the classic “submarine syndrome” used by some guys.

There are at least six possible reasons why he hasn’t contacted you after a great date. Your difficulty is trying to determine what the REAL reason is.

1. He’s a lazy dater and wants you to contact him. This is a red flag. Don’t chase him. He’s the man and he should be chasing you. He could be egotistical and think he’s God’s gift to women and women should chase him. Or he could be lazy and doesn’t want to do the work that’s required to get to know you. Or he could be shy and be nervous about contacting you.

You have to decide which of these options applies to him. You should be able to tell that from your interaction with him on the date. How did he act? Was he outgoing? Did he drop hints that he went on lots of dates or lots of women were interested in him? Did he seem hesitant and shy? Or did he seem nonchalant or laid back to the point where he had a take it or leave it attitude and didn’t seem that interested unless you did all of the work?

2. He didn’t feel chemistry or a spark on the date and decides not to pursue you. (There’s nothing you can do in this situation and it’s best to move on.)

Sometimes a guy will say that he had a great time with you but in truth he didn’t feel any connection and while he thought you were nice he really doesn’t want to pursue a relationship with you.

If there’s chemistry and a spark initially chances are he’s going to be into you. He’s going to be flirting and having fun and making sure you have fun. And, if he’s on the ball, he’s going to tell you he’s interested in you and he’d like to see you again.

3. You said or did something that turned him off. (Again, there’s nothing you can do so you might as well look for another guy)

You probably won’t know if you did this or what you did to turn him off, but if you’re not getting a lot of second or third dates that could be a clue you’re doing something wrong.

4. There is a legitimate reason why he hasn’t called.

An emergency or crazy work schedule or time conflict fall into this category.

Although rare, sometimes there are legitimate reasons why a guy hasn’t called. Be open to the idea that this might be one of those times.

Keep this in mind: A great date – and a promising relationship – can turn into a disaster depending on how you respond to him if he does contact you a week or two after the date.

5. You’re not right for him.

Sometimes you can have a great first or second date with a guy but things fizzle out. This happens because after the date he’s thinking about things. He’s future projecting a bit. He’s trying to figure out what it would be like to have you in his life.

Maybe you’re sociable and he’s not. Maybe you like to hang with friends and family and he doesn’t. Maybe you like adventure and you like to travel and he doesn’t.

He thinks of these things and they determine whether he thinks a relationship with you is worth pursuing. If, for some reason, he doesn’t feel you’re compatible with each other he’s not going to contact you.

Keep in mind that a guy doesn’t like drama. It’s easier to fade away quietly than to come right out and say that he doesn’t think things will work out.

6. The timing is wrong.

You go on a few great dates with him and you get to know him. During those dates you discover things about each other.

It might have to do with future plans. It might have to do with where you both are in your life or careers. You might be planning on a major life change. Or he might have plans to travel or go to college or university or move to another town.

The potential for a relationship might be there but the circumstances just don’t work out. You’re at different stages in your lives and your lives wouldn’t mesh into a long term relationship.

7. He’s uncertain whether he should pursue you.

He might be shy. He might be inexperienced. He might not know if you gave him the “green light” to pursue you. He doesn’t know what you’re thinking and whether you like him.

Perhaps you didn’t give him signals that indicated you’re interested in him. Or he didn’t pick up on the signals you gave him.

So he’s confused. He has to sort things out in his own mind and decide whether he wants to get to know you better.

After all, he doesn’t want to make a fool of himself and be shot down if you rebuff him or ignore him.

This is a legitimate reason to give him another chance.

3 Choices You Face If He Takes His Time To Phone You

You have three main choices if a man you’ve just dated doesn’t phone you within a day or two after a great date:

1. You can give him a piece of your mind, show him how angry you are, and blow him off. (Definitely a mood killer and a great way to ruin any chance of a relationship)

This is usually the reaction most women will have. They had their hopes pinned on this guy and he dashes those hopes away in an instant by appearing disinterested and taking his time to call again.

Maybe he’s playing it cool and doesn’t want to appear too eager.

Maybe he’s inexperienced with dating.

Or maybe he’s not that into you.

Getting your hopes up too much and too early is especially true with online dating – you develop a rapport with a guy, seem to be getting along well, message each other frequently so that it becomes an established routine, and then he disappears for a few days or his communication with you becomes intermittent.

You begin to wonder what’s up…and you get angry with him for “standing you up.”

2. You can ignore his call and not return his calls. (It’s a surefire way to get over him and move onto the next guy if you’re absolutely certain you don’t want to get to know him better.)

This usually signifies that you’re angry at the guy and don’t want anything more to do with him.

If that’s the case, it’s time to move on and look for another guy.

3. You can cut him some slack and pursue things with him to see where they lead. (Best choice if you’re interested in him.)

Sometimes it turns out that it’s worth giving a guy a second chance. Keep in mind that there may be a very valid reason why he took so long to get back to you – it could be work related. Or he could have been sick, or his children could have been sick.

How would you feel, for example, if you got angry with him and gave him a piece of your mind when in fact his father was gravely ill and he had to make an emergency trip to see his father?

Or what if he’s a medical student who’s on call at all hours of the day and night and when he’s free you’re not?

You have to show understanding about his circumstances. It’s not about making excuses for him, it’s about taking a step back and seeing things through his eyes.

Until you know the facts, don’t assume that he isn’t interested. Sure, maybe he is a lazy dater. If that’s the case then at some point you’ll have to politely tell him how you like to be treated…or look for another guy.

But don’t write him off completely – at least not yet – if you’re interested in him.

If the guy is a decent guy, you’re attracted to him, and it’s worth pursuing to see if he has signs he has boyfriend potential then when he phones be sweet and keep things light and fun.

What Most Guys Expect

Most guys expect that they will be chastised if they don’t phone soon after a date. If he does phone you and you cut him some slack and show him you welcome the opportunity to get to know him better you will stand out from the majority of other women.

If you chastise him, get angry with him, argue with him, try and teach him manners, or make him feel bad for taking so long to contact you after the date, then you won’t get a second chance with him.

If you are cold towards him and start playing games or you are not understanding, then you’ve lost him. He definitely won’t pursue you.

Of course, he might be the type of guy who has you “in reserve.” In this situation, he dates other women to see if there is a connection with them.

You’re his “alternate choice” if things don’t work out with another woman. While this might not be very flattering to you, it may turn out to be to your benefit in the long run if he chooses you over other women. After all, we all choose one person over another when we decide to be in an exclusive relationship. And at this point, he’s not in a committed relationship with you so he’s free to date other women, just as you’re free to date other men.

Next time a great guy doesn’t phone you a day or two after a wonderful date and leaves you cooling your heels for a while, consider whether you want to get to know him or not.

If you do, keep it light and upbeat when he phones and see if a relationship develops. (But the next time you meet, let him know in a nice way how you prefer to be treated in the future without him thinking you’ve been sitting by the phone waiting for him to call – which is a no-no.)

The key is not to jump to conclusions until you know the facts because sometimes your assumptions can be incorrect.

If he doesn’t phone you then move on unless you decide to take the initiative to contact him…and find out once and for all whether he’s interested in spending time with you. (Be prepared for him to tell you he’s not interested. And if you do phone him and you get a cool (as in disinterested) “Oh, hi” from him, chances are he’s not that into you.)

In fact, there’s nothing wrong in taking the initiative. It’s not “chasing” him like many people think. It’s showing interest and then letting him take the lead and show you how he feels about you.

If he’s not interested in you, it’s okay to be disappointed. But it’s not the end of the world. In fact, he’s done you a favor – you can now concentrate on finding your Mr. Right – someone who will move Heaven and Earth to be with you and show you he adores you.

How To Avoid Guessing Whether He’s
“The One” And Mr. Right For You

Chances are, if he hasn’t phoned or texted you within a day or two after going on a great first or second date, he’s not into you as much as you’re into him.

After all, a guy who is interested in you will go to great lengths and crawl a mile over broken glass to see you again – unless there’s a valid reason he couldn’t text or call.

You see, when a guy is interested in you he’s going to romance you and woo you.

He’s going to be hot for you.

Because he’s attracted to you.

If he doesn’t text, call, or romance you, then he’s probably not the guy for you because there are a lot of men out there who are single and available who still romance women and show their interest in her.

He has to show his interest, even if it’s with just a text.

It shouldn’t be just one text, either.

It should be continued contact to show that he wants to be on your mind all the time.

A guy who wants to be romantically involved with you will usually do romantic things.

He might write poems.

Or he might send you romantic texts.

Or he might flirt with you.

Or he might buy you flowers.

He might take you on a romantic date.

These are all signs a man is interested in you.

If you’re getting a different vibe – and he’s only interested in a one night stand or a booty call – then he’s a pass.

He’s not interested in a relationship with you. And you won’t change his mind by sleeping with him.

That’s when you need to try something different and attract a man who’s looking for a wonderful woman like you and wants to be in a long term relationship.

There’s no point in hanging around waiting for love to happen, sitting by the phone waiting for a guy to call, and passing up opportunities with other men, wishing and hoping this one guy you went on a great date with – who hasn’t shown enough interest in you – will come around, change his mind, and want to be in a relationship with you.

If you’re ready for love and you want a great man in your life, you have to take the initiative and look for a man who will love, cherish, appreciate and adore you.

This isn’t about “rules.”

Instead, it’s about having the tools to help you find and catch the man of your dreams.

If you want to “up your dating game” then there’s a wonderful way to do that with this special system that cracks the “Guy Code” and shows you how to meet new, single and available men.

It shows you how to find a boyfriend and get a boyfriend – but not just any boyfriend. After all, it’s not hard to get a boyfriend.

Instead, you’re looking for the right man, the man who wants to be in a long term relationship and who will commit to you.

You’ll discover…

>> The best places to find HOT men

>> Key questions to ask any man you’re chatting with online so you don’t waste your time

>> Top internet dating scams to avoid

>>The Ultimate Mr. Right Checklist to help you determine whether the man you’re dating is right for you

>> And much more, including relationship stories and what to do in specific dating and relationship situations to avoid wasting your precious time or getting hurt.

Check out the system that shows you how to crack the guy code here.


how to find and get a boyfriend

Relationship Advice For Women – Are You Too Picky When Looking For A Great Guy?

prettyrose“Some women are so picky when looking for a guy that they miss out on a great guy. It’s not about having everything you want, it’s about having what’s important to you in a relationship.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach.

No relationship advice for women would be complete without asking this question:

Do you think finding and falling in love with your Mr. Right “will happen?”

That one day Mr. Right will come along?

Just like a Cinderella story…where your Prince will magically appear and you’ll fall in love and live happily ever after.

If you are thinking that finding your Mr. Right will just “happen” without any effort on your part, then it’s probably time to change your mindset if you want to find a great guy.

Because chances are you’ll be waiting and waiting for Mr. Right…who won’t come along.

Having Mr. Right magically appear in your life is so rare you really can’t count on it happening.

Maybe you’ve been in bad relationships before and found they haven’t worked.

So you think to yourself that this time you’ll wait for the right guy to come along.

That you’ll stumble upon him at some chance meeting as you’re going about your daily routine.

I know how easy it is to give up when you haven’t had much – or any – luck in previous relationships.

Or where you’ve been badly hurt and you don’t want to be hurt again.

How To Attract Men Table of Contents
What To Avoid Doing On The First Date | Internet Dating Scams | Best Online Dating Services

How To Find A Boyfriend

If you want to succeed in finding a great guy you have to be proactive in your search for the guy of your dreams.

You can’t just wait and let things happen.

You have to seek out your Mr. Right.

I know it makes for a great romantic movie for two people to meet by chance and instantly fall in love.

That you were destined for each other and just had to find each other – as in the movie Serendipity starring John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale.

But the reality is it’s not what usually happens in real life.

If you think Mr. Right will magically appear on your doorstep, one day you’ll wake up and find that you’re ten years older with fewer prospects for a relationship or marriage.

So what do you do?

First, you have to take the initiative in finding a guy.

Yes, you have to meet men.

Yes, you have to try online dating.

And yes, you might have to sort through a lot of men before you find the guy who makes you tingle.

Secondly, you have to change your expectations about what you want in a guy…because that may be what is holding you back from finding a great guy.

That doesn’t mean lowering your standards.

It means that you have to be more flexible in your “checklist” of desirable qualities you want in a guy in order to widen the pool of eligible guys.

This is a concept that I’ve noticed with online dating.

Are You Being Too Selective?

Here’s the problem: You’re very likely being too selective, too restrictive, and too picky when looking for “The One.”

And that could be hurting your dating and relationship life.

> Instead of restricting your search to guys taller than 5 feet 10 inches, for example, include guys who are a little shorter.

> Instead of looking for guys who are athletic, include guys who are less active.

> Instead of looking for guys with all of your interests, look for guys who have some of your interests.

> Instead of looking for guys who are a year or two older than you are, expand the age range – it opens up more prospects for you to consider. (Older men are sometimes better prospects for a relationship because they’re more established in their careers and are looking for a stable, long term relationship.)

Be open to more possibilities.

Here’s what a typical woman does, especially if she’s using online dating to find a guy…

She reads a guy’s profile on an online dating site.

And what does she find?

How about…

> The spelling isn’t quite right on a couple of words. (A big turnoff for most women. And guys, too.)

> Or the photo isn’t very flattering. (Another turnoff – for both men and women – if it’s not a good photo.)

> He’s not into the arts and she is.

> He doesn’t make a lot of money.

> He’s not into sports and she is.

> He’s not her intellectual equal because he doesn’t have a Ph.D. or at least a university education.

As she’s reading the guy’s profile she’s mentally checking off the things she doesn’t like about him.

She’s so focused looking for the qualities she wants in a man that she overlooks his good qualities.

And those good qualities could be that he’s a loving man who will make her feel cherished and valued as a woman.

He might even be a fantastic lover!

(On the other hand, she may be so focused on his photo (because he’s so good looking) that she doesn’t read his profile and doesn’t take note of his bad qualities or flaws. Her single qualification is how handsome he looks.)

Are You Prejudging Him?

But she will never find out because she’s already rejected him without even contacting him and finding out more about him.

Instead, in many cases, she’s focusing on the negatives.

You see, many times she won’t be able to find those good qualities just from reading an online dating profile.

She’s definitely found the negative things about him – or what she thinks are negative qualities.

But chances are she didn’t find many or all of his positive qualities.

She has prejudged and excluded the guy before she even gets to know him.

I see it often enough on online dating sites – a woman writes in her profile, “If I don’t respond it’s because I don’t think we’d be a good match.”

Obviously there will be guys who are not a good match right from the start.

It could be because of distance.

It could be because of his habits like smoking or alcohol or drugs.

It could be that she has so many emails from guys that she has to save time by eliminating those guys that she “thinks” aren’t suitable for her.

But how does she know she won’t be a good match with many of the men who contact her or whose profile she reads?

She hasn’t even taken the time to get to know the guy!

She’s prejudged him based on his profile.

She’s prejudged him because he wrote to her and all he said, “Hi.” (Not the greatest way to woo a woman, but let’s be realistic, some guys just aren’t that good at doing this sort of thing.)

She’s crossed him off her list without finding out more about him.

At the very least she could email him to see if there are common interests, beliefs, and values.

This isn’t about sounding harsh or being scolding because of what women do, because it isn’t.

What she’s doing is perfectly normal and understandable.

Both men and women do it all the time. Not just with online dating but also when they’re out a clubs or at parties.

She doesn’t want to waste her time with someone she doesn’t feel she’ll have a connection with.

That’s how most of us are programmed – we look for similarities and differences and while we’re reading an online dating profile we weigh and judge the person so that we can arrive at a decision about whether or not to contact them or meet them.

This can be an intense battle in your head, too, as you think to yourself what you like and don’t like about the guy’s profile.

Maybe it’s the photo.

Maybe it’s what he says in his profile.

Or maybe what he doesn’t say in his profile. (Let’s face it, many men really aren’t very good at writing online dating profiles.)

But what if that guy who is a little shorter than you like, or who doesn’t know how to spell a word or two, or who has some bizarre interest in ancient pottery, is exactly what you’ve been looking for?

What if he’s an adventurous type who can keep you fascinated with stories of his travels.

Or what if he’s a geek who’s a whiz with numbers but isn’t perfect with the King’s English…but has a lifestyle you’ve always dreamed about.

My point is that you could be skipping over good men because of how you’re “vetting” them based on their profiles alone.

Many women say there are no good men out there.

That all of the good ones are taken.

That they’ve given up hope of finding a great guy.

The truth is, there are tons of great guys out there.

Your mission is to find the one who is right for you.

How To Find A Great Guy

The challenge (and, I’ll admit, it’s a very real challenge) is to resist prejudging a guy before you get to know him.

It happens all the time and it could be hurting your chances to find a great guy.

When you’re in your 20’s it doesn’t matter as much because there’s a large pool of available guys to draw upon.

But as you get into your 30’s and 40’s – and beyond – that pool gets smaller.

The reality is that the pool of available guys shrinks more and more as you mature. The pickier you are, the less chance you have of finding the guy who is right for you.

And here’s something else…

We’d all like to think love hits like a bolt of lightening when we meet someone new.

But it doesn’t.

Love takes time to develop.

If there’s no spark and no chemistry at first then most women will move on to the next guy. (And that reaction isn’t exclusive to women because guys do the same thing.)

They feel there’s nothing there – no chance of a relationship – simply because they didn’t feel the spark.

Trouble is, they could be missing out on a terrific man.

Someone who will appreciate them and love them and care for them and have their back.

Funny thing is that you can’t tell whether a guy has those qualities you’re looking for without getting to know him.

You can’t tell from his emails.

You can’t tell from his phone calls.

You can’t tell from his text messages.

You can’t tell in a first meeting.

You can’t even tell from the first few dates!

You can’t tell what his good (and bad) qualities are without spending time with him and seeing how he interacts with you and how he treats you over time.

Spend time finding out how you feel when you’re with him.

He might be…

> The guy who looks after you when you’re sick.

> The guy who stands up for you and helps you out when you’re stressed at work.

> The guy who pitches in and cooks dinner when you come home late from work instead of sitting around watching TV or playing video games and asks what’s for dinner the moment you come through the door.

Hopefully he’s not…

x The guy who cheats on you.

x The guy who sponges off you and lets you pay all the bills.

x The guy who tries to control your life and treats you badly.

You won’t know what he’s like until you get to know him.

And that means spending time with him.

There are just as many stories about women who didn’t even like their boyfriends or husbands at first but later fell in love with them…as there are stories about falling in love with them shortly after they met them.

Sometimes the chemistry is there right from the beginning.

Other times – and more often – it takes time for the chemistry to develop as you get to know each other.

As you get to see each other’s qualities.

Next time you’re hanging around with your girlfriends and lamenting that there are no good guys, stop and think why you can’t find them – because they’re waiting to meet you if you give them the chance.

And, the next time you’re looking for a relationship and checking out guys, start including guys you wouldn’t normally date.

Add them to your “maybe” list.

Instead of recoiling with horror at the very suggestion of having to change your criteria, be open to the idea of expanding your list of possibilities.

Keep an open mind.

You might just find a hidden gem who turns out to be the guy of your dreams.

How To Attract And Meet Men

Blaine Barrington is a Dating and Relationship coach who helps single women find their Mr. Right. He’s the author of the Girl Gets Great Guy System – The System That Cracks The “Guy Code” And Helps You Find The Man Of Your Dreams.

The Girl Gets Great Guy System is for the woman who has experienced any of the following:

– Is longing for a loving relationship
– Has had her heart broken too many times
– Intimidates men without meaning to
– Always seems to pick losers and deadbeats
– Wants to have more dates with quality men – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank Carlos Koblischek for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: Rose (c) Carlos Koblischek Image #1421435 Photo by carloszk on

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