“Look for these signs he’s a great guy with boyfriend potential.” Blaine Barrington, Dating and Relationship Coach

What you’ve invariably learned about love is that a relationship that initially looks promising doesn’t mean it will last. Sometimes the chemistry isn’t as strong as you thought. Other times you discover you’re not as compatible as you thought.

Just look at the Bachelorette TV Show as an example.

It’s so easy to fall in love with a handsome, funny, charismatic man.

The locations and settings are romantic.

There are candle-lit dinners.

There’s attraction.

There’s instant chemistry.

There’s passion.

There are fireworks.

There are private and public appearances with musicians, bands, and celebrities.

There are fun things to do either as a group or on a one-on-one date.

There’s the fantasy suite where the Bachelorette and her final choices “get to know each other” better.

It’s like you’re in a relationship bubble of romance and passion.

It’s so easy to fall in love when you feel the strong attraction and the chemistry.

The heart rules.

The reality, though can be totally different.

There’s the TV relationship that suddenly turns from seeing each other often to being in a long distance relationship because the Bachelorette and the “winner” live in different cities.

There can be the family dynamics where the parents and siblings are skeptical and don’t fully accept the Bachelorette’s new boyfriend.

There can be career situations where one has to give up their job or career to be with the other if they decide to live together.

The distance and time apart becomes a problem and decisions have to be made about who has to move so they can be together.

Invariably time will tell whether there’s a true connection and true compatibility and whether this is a lasting relationship or one that fizzles out.

As you know, when it comes to love and relationships there are no guarantees.

But there are clues that increase your chances of finding a great guy…and knowing you have found a great guy.

It’s not that difficult to decide if a guy has boyfriend potential. Because if you’re feeling the chemistry and you like him and he’s nice then chances are he’s a great guy to have as a boyfriend.

Sometimes when you’re falling in love or you’re initially smitten with a guy, you need to take a step back to look at things objectively. If you feel deep down that something is not quite right then listen to your instincts because chances are something isn’t right.

You’ll generally have two situations with relationships:

1. You’re just getting to know a guy but you haven’t moved beyond that to be considered boyfriend and girlfriend in an exclusive relationship

2. You’re beyond the beginning stages of getting to know each other and you’re moving into or you’re already in an exclusive or monogamous relationship. By this time you should be boyfriend and girlfriend although there will be situations where it’s not as well defined even though you spend time together.

If you have any doubts that the guy you’re interested in is boyfriend material, then here are some signs a guy could make a good boyfriend (think of this a your “boyfriend material checklist” or “good guy checklist”).

1. He’s Not A Player And He Wants A Relationship

Players usually have a reputation for being a “player.” They could even be pickup artists.

They’re usually easy to spot once you get to know them a little bit.

They frequent clubs and bars for the night life and the action.

So if you’re into that scene as well, then chances are you’re going to run into a player.

They’re smooth. They have good pickup lines. They know what to say to “woo” women.

However, players usually have short(er) term relationships. They might play the field. They might be into one-night stands.

They might even have a large number of women who are their friends.

Players usually grow weary of their existing relationship and look for someone “better.” So their investment in the relationship might not be as much as yours because they know it will eventually end and they will move on.

A guy with boyfriend potential is a good guy. A nice guy. In a way, that might even seem boring.

But he’s definitely not a rebel or a bad boy.

He doesn’t play games and he wants to be in a relationship.

He doesn’t want to play the field and you’re not another notch in his bedpost.

2. You Can Rely On Him And Trust What He Says

His word is his bond. You can rely on what he says.

He’s not the type who says one thing and does the exact opposite.

If he says he’ll do something you can trust that he’ll keep his word.

3. He Makes You Feel Happy When You’re With Him

He has a calming influence on you. It’s exciting to be with him because he’s a fun guy and he makes you feel good about yourself.

He makes you feel safe and desired.

Best of all, there are no pretenses – you can be yourself around him and he’s himself around you.

4. Your Friends And Family Like Him

The rebel doesn’t care what others think about him. And that can cause unnecessary friction with those who are closest to you.

There’s nothing more stressful and upsetting than knowing your friends and family don’t like your boyfriend.

Sometimes they’re wrong. But chances are they see something about him that you don’t – and it’s not a good sign.

A great boyfriend will treat your friends and family well and get to know them.

You know you’ve got a keeper when your friends and family aren’t telling you to ditch him because he’s no good for you or you deserve better.

Better still if your girlfriends ask you to tell them if you and your guy ever break up because they think he’s hot.

5. He Knows What’s Important To You

He listens to you and knows what you like and don’t like.

He knows what’s important to you and he respects that. He doesn’t put you down, criticize you, or make you feel stupid or inadequate because you have certain beliefs or morals or tastes.

6. He Thinks You’re Hot Even When You’re Not Feeling (or Looking) Hot

Chances are you have those days when you feel fat or you just don’t feel pretty.

But a great guy makes you feel pretty by the way he treats you and the things he says to you.  That’s the type of guy you want to have around.

He makes you feel good about yourself.

To him, you’re hot, no matter how you feel about yourself. And that’s a good thing.

7. He’s Your Friend

He’s the type of guy you can confide in.

He’s the type of guy you can talk to about (almost) anything.

He’s there for you when things get tough.

He’s there to encourage you and cheer you on.

He’s there to listen to you and give you advice if you ask for it.

8. He Cares

He cares about you.

He cares how you feel.

He cares about your feelings.

He cares about what’s important to you.

He’s there to support you.

He has your back.

And while all these little factors might at first not seem very important, how he feels about you (now and as time goes on) is a major factor in determining whether he’ll make a great boyfriend.

You might not find all of these qualities in the guy you’re interested in. But the more qualities you do find, the better the chances are that he IS boyfriend material and he is someone you should seriously consider to have in your life.

The next step, after dating for a while, and getting to know each other better, is to decide whether he’s a keeper – the man you might want to eventually marry.

Because in the early stages of dating everything is fresh and new.

It’s exciting.

It’s thrilling.

It’s exhilarating.

It’s about dreaming of a future with someone you fall in love with.

As times goes on though, you’ll discover things about him that you like and don’t like.

Things that were “cute” at first could become irritants later on.

Or they could just be things that you accept because your love for him grows deeper and deeper.

Most importantly, though, you’ll discover whether you’re compatible or not.

Compatibility is one of the keys to a lasting relationship.

It determines whether you can get along with each other, whether you enjoy being with each other, and whether you grow together as a couple.

In many cases, these early stages of a relationship can be the most challenging.

You see he has “boyfriend potential” but you get caught up in the attraction and the lust and passion.

That’s what Mother Nature intended to happen.

Of course, there’s another side to relationships.

It’s about getting to know each other and understanding who that person is at the very core of their being.

Ultimately, you have to determine whether he’s the person you want in your life.

You’ll be asking yourself questions (and looking for answers to questions) like…

Is he a nice person?

Is he kind?

Does he fly off the handle, get moody and start arguments, or show road rage?

Does he show empathy and gentleness to you and others?

Does he help others or is he selfish?

Would he be a good husband who would keep you safe and look after you?

Would he be a good father and raise children you’d be proud of?

In the initial stages of getting to know each other, things always seem so positive.

He’s your dream guy.

He can do no wrong.

But that’s because you don’t really know him very well.

What issues does he bring to the relationship from his past?

How was he raised?

How has he been treated by women in past relationships?

Why did his past relationships fail?

What lessons has he learned from his past relationships?

Is he looking for a partner or arm candy?

Will he be a fantastic provider but be so busy with his career that you always come second and feel lonely and unloved in your relationship (or marriage)?

Knowing how your man reacts in different situations is also important.

Does he pull away and withdraw?

Does he go cold and distant?

Does he push you away when you want to be amorous?

Is he controlling?

Does he do things that hurt or disturb you?

These are the questions that can only be answered with time as you interact with him and get to know him.

If you’ve found a man you want as your boyfriend or you want to spend the rest of your life with, then you have to know how to KEEP him.

You have to be the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with.

Truth is, you’re in competition with other women who are vying for his attention and affection – even when he is in a committed relationship.

If he loses interest in you it might be because he’s more interested in other women.

But a man who loves, cherishes, appreciates and adores you has eyes only for you.

It’s not enough to be sexy.

It’s not enough to be a tigress in bed and be able to turn him on and inflame his desire.

Men not only think differently than women, they have a “checklist” of what is important to them when they select a life partner.

If you’ve ever wondered why a man breaks up with the woman he’s been dating for a long time and then marries someone else (usually shortly after), it’s because the “other woman” did something that made him choose her over all other women.

In fact, it’s very likely the woman he married knew the secrets to understanding her man so that he adored her.

If you want to increase your chances that your boyfriend will love you and adore you, then find out how to inspire him to love, cherish, appreciate and adore you here.

 

GirlGetsGreatGuy.com – the site that gives dating advice to women and shows them how to find their Mr. Right – wishes to thank Stephen Gibson for the beautiful photo used in this article. Image credit: Beautiful valentine chocolate hearts image #1254000 at freeimages.com